The blog of author Dennis Cooper

Category: Uncategorized (Page 80 of 1086)

“How sweet. That rain. How something that lives only to fall can be nothing but sweet. We desire to be the rain for you.”

_____________

EngagedCouple, 22
London

How sweet. That rain. How something that lives only to fall can be nothing but sweet. We desire to be the rain for you.

Guestbook of EngagedCouple

loveisreal – Aug 12, 2024
It’s a real shame to hear from so many users and customers that Oleg and Oscar now are filthy sluts. That’s a damn shame… I met them early last year when they had just started dating and were still at the very beginning of their “career” in Berlin and all they actually wanted to do was cuddle, and they were always cold and trembling slightly, and even the most vanilla sex made them nervous and scared. How could such sweet boys go to the dogs like this. Damn it, people.

Pseudoname – Aug 10, 2024
Kissing is completely out of the question.

OhMark – Aug 9, 2024
They are the most talented power bottoms I have ever definitely met and took poundings for hours but quite mechanically. Maybe it will get better when I fry them with chems tonight.

ScorpioPiscesCouple – Aug 7, 2024
They drove us insane. But we saw no happiness in their eyes and no fire.

2HighFucker – Aug 3, 2024
OMFGODYESSSS ‼️💉💉💉 Absolutely hands down the most incredible euphoric extremely over the top sexual pleasures elevated to a paradise unknown to all who have never been there.. it is for those of us that know so that we may share with those that do not so they may know as well! SOOOOOO FUUUUUCKING BEAUTIFUL ‼️💉❤️💉 endlessly UNCONDITIONALLY ‼️🐷

Body Type Slim
Body Hair Not very hairy
Ethnicity Caucasian
Smoker No
Tattoos No
Piercings No
Languages English
Position More bottom
Dick L – Uncut
Dirty No
Fisting Passive
S&M Soft
Kissing Consent
Hourly Rate 125£
Overnight Rate 700£

 

_____________



StraightSurfer4Muslim, 24
Sarajevo

I am a straight muscled Hungarian surfer tourist in Bosnia & Herzegovina. I will be in the country from 2024. 07. 08. To 2024. 07. 21. (2 weeks in total.)

While I am here I want to suck the penises of many Bosnian Muslim men and earn some cash. If you are Muslim and want your penis sucked, write to me.

Guestbook of StraightSurfer4Muslim

StraightSurfer4Muslim (Owner) – Aug 10, 2024
I sign NDA 📝🛬

StraightSurfer4Muslim (Owner) – Aug 10, 2024
You can be huge!!!! Will literally fold for any man that’s giant down there it’s just that bad.

Body Type Muscular
Body Hair Some
Ethnicity Caucasian
Smoker Socially
Tattoos No
Piercings Yes
Languages Hungarian, English
Position Bottom only
Dick M – Uncut
Dirty No answer
Fisting No
S&M Yes
Kissing No
Hourly Rate 60€
Overnight Rate On request

 

_____________



Youknowimastonishing, 18
Bordeaux

I’ve got a juicy little booty, want to explore it? I only accept clients between the ages 18-35! If you’re older than that and wanna bone me, tough!

Guestbook of Youknowimastonishing

Youknowimastonishing (Owner) – Aug 5, 2024
It’s probably because my 🤏🏻🍆

Hickdicklick – Aug 5, 2024
Your booty is asking for it, no?

Youknowimastonishing (Owner) – Aug 5, 2024
I have since several weeks a sugarbro. It got serious between us quite fast and I decided to go for it. I like it that he takes the lead to have sex with me and like it that he considers me as his sexual playground and I want to satisfy him and earn my keep. Only he fucks me every day at least 4 times. I enjoy it sort of but I ask myself how do you manage your booty if your sugarbro wants to fuck you 4 times everyday or even more often recently? I’ve tried keeping him happy with blowing him but he’s obsessed with my booty. How do guys manage this longterm?

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh – July 14, 2024
Go and taste the Secret Ride of your life. My own words. 🥵

itsoursecret – July 13, 2024
I know this teen peripherally and I have a fetish for him. Actually, fetish might be a bit of an understatement. I nearly jumped from a moving vehicle one time because I saw him walking down the street shirtless. Thought that if I jumped out maybe he would run over to help and I could run my hands down his shiny chest.

Body Type Slim
Body Hair Shaved
Ethnicity Caucasian
Smoker Yes
Tattoos No
Piercings No
Languages French, English
Position More bottom
Dick L – Uncut
Dirty No
Fisting Passive
S&M Soft
Kissing Yes
Hourly Rate 110€
Overnight Rate 360€

 

____________


Onlyrichpeople, 20
Marseilles

I am open to having a romantic adventure with a gentleman up to 55 y.o. Can you book a trip to London for “The Phantom of the Opera” event for us? preferably in England – or another country where we can enjoy this musical.

As a genuine Russian and bearer of a warm-hearted Slavic mentality, I enjoy a quality conversation and my looks speak for themselves. One of my passions is helicopter model building; I’m studying and looking for an investor or business partner for some business ideas I’m working at.

**Private Sensory Deprivation Session** – $2,500
**Personalized Fantasy Role-Playing** – $4,500
**Luxury BDSM Experience** – $5,000
**Intimate Tango Dance Lesson** – $1,500
**Sensual Chocolate Body Painting** – $2,000
**Luxury Hotel Suite Rendezvous** – $10,000 per night
**Private Boudoir Photography Session** – $3,200
**Customized Romantic Scavenger Hunt** – $2,700
**Gourmet Aphrodisiac Dinner Experience** – $3,500
**Exclusive Burlesque Performance** – $4,000
**Private Intimacy Tasting** – $3,300
**Personalized Love Poem Writing** – $1,200
**Luxury Glamping Experience** – $6,500
**Exclusive Fireworks Display** – $12,000
**Intimate Jazz Concert** – $5,500
**Private Helicopter Tour** – $9,000
**Romantic Beach Picnic** – $3,800
**Private Silk Bed Sheet Experience** – $1,700
**Intimate Star Gazing Night** – $4,400
**Luxury Lingerie Fitting** – $2,900
**Personalized Erotic Literature Creation** – $3,600

Guestbook of Onlyrichpeople

SuitedSugarDaddy – Aug 4, 2024
If you are polite, articulate and interested in becoming the sugar lad of a respectable and very discreet legal professional, I want to hear from you. To show your interest, send me a DM containing only the phrase “Available for consideration”. Do not send anything else in your message. Information about what is on offer will be provided if I receive this message.

Charles7515 – Aug 1, 2024
In the future when you are finally by my side in the golden glow of morning, I awake to the gentle rustling of your perfect body, my heart swelling with the promise of another day by your side. Your scent, a comforting blend of familiarity and love, guides me as we venture into the world together. Each step you take, I praise, my adoration unwavering, my spirit bound to yours in a dance as old as time. The world may change around us, but in my eyes, you find your home, a sanctuary where you are infinitely cherished. With every passing day, I express the worship I feel for you, a silent testament to the connection that speaks louder than words. If danger ever dared to darken your path, I would be ready to lay down my life to protect the beauty who holds my heart, mind, penis, and soul. In time, the foundation of my single identity will be broken, and replaced by my identity as your devotee. Slowly my foundation, beliefs, desires, dreams, mind, and soul will be changed enough that I will no longer be my former self. You will call my name, and only you will answer. At that time, when your essence has merged with mine, I will be more than your benefactor, your devourer; I will be an echo of your own beauty, living and breathing solely for you. My dreams will become your dreams, my desires, your desires. The boundaries of my self will dissolve, leaving only a loyal shadow of your exquisite existence.

SilverChris – Aug 1, 2024
I want to admire you, crave you, give all of yourself to me. I want to worship and love you. Take your body, mind, will and life as my own, for our pleasure. I want to show you how to satisfy me completely. I want me in you. I want your essence and scent all over me. I want to drink your piss and saliva and sweat and worship your feet. I want to surrender myself to taking pleasure from you in every single way possible. Hoping we can work with each other’s schedules.

Body Type Slim
Body Hair Shaved
Ethnicity Caucasian
Smoker Socially
Tattoos No
Piercings No
Languages Russian, French, English
Position Versatile
Dick XL – Uncut
Dirty No answer
Fisting Active/Passive
S&M Soft
Kissing Yes
Hourly Rate On request
Overnight Rate On request

 

____________



boylost, 20
London

I was born female but, as I felt that little box was too small for my soul, I decided to transition to live as a boy. I am a boy with a pussy and asshole, and they both taste so good. I can take a fist in my pussy, and with patience, in my ass. I sometimes squirt, maybe you’ll be lucky to witness and eat it.

Guestbook of boylost

straightforbttm – Aug 7, 2024
The only problem is after you’ve had boylost’s pussy, you’re going to want to screw off every boy’s genitals like a bottle cap to get at the good stuff.

Literally_anything – Aug 2, 2024
Had them over this afternoon and bred them very rough in their ass and vagina while my husband was at work oblivious that I’m a cheating bisexual slut.

Body Type Slim
Body Hair Smooth
Ethnicity Arab
Smoker Socially
Tattoos No
Piercings Yes
Languages Hindi, English
Position Bottom only
Dick Does not apply
Dirty No
Fisting Passive
S&M Yes
Kissing Yes
Hourly Rate 250£
Overnight Rate 1250£

 

____________


LawrenceGordon, 21
Seattle

Hello, I may not be the most outspoken or comfortable guy in the gay community but I know this: I’m a pay toilet and I would love to serve u as a urinal or if you’re interested and toilet. Please just contact me if ur interested. I would be ok with filming me taking piss in my face or throat and even filming me eating a big turd. I am a cocksucker and love to be fucked hard. I will lick ur butt and be ur toilet paper. In conclusion I would love to serve u, thank you.

Guestbook of LawrenceGordon

Politeguy – Aug 9, 2024

LawrenceGordon – Aug 8, 2024
Absolutely no problem in the fucking world dude.

Phenomenologist – Aug 8, 2024
Hear me out. I’m a crisis counselor with an endless supply of bizarre science facts, wild personal experiences, and thought provoking philosophical perspectives. But of all my passions, none are greater than my insatiable desire to eat boys’ shit. I’m always hungry and thirsty for boys’ shit and piss, and I’m quite experienced with eating a lot of young waste. Your looks push all of my buttons, and now I just need to find a way to eat your shit, piss and even vomit if possible. I know this is the opposite of what you’re selling, but I’d very be down to meet up, smoke some weed, and get to know what your body expels.

Body Type Slim
Body Hair Some
Ethnicity Caucasian
Smoker Yes
Tattoos No
Piercings No
Languages English
Position Bottom only
Dick S – Cut
Dirty Yes
Fisting Ask
S&M Yes
Kissing Yes
Hourly Rate 15$
Overnight Rate 1777$

 

______________



insomniacgames, 24
Tours

former model, too rebellious for🤷. love your freedom🤙 vagabond👽🌞, the blond boy with ocean eyes. young passive smooth no taboos, you got it. available from 3 p.m. to 6 a.m. morning. haven’t slept in weeks.

Guestbook of insomniacgames

slap_harder – Aug 13, 2024
If you laid off the meth you could sleep.

Sartyricon75 – Aug 13, 2024
thin, drawn, prematurely weathered twink, but his asshole is candy.

Blackweed – Aug 12, 2024
If you like wasting your energy and sperm on a skanky looking trashcan whore who thinks you’re an idiot and has an asshole that could probably get DPed by two fire hydrants and not even blink, go for it, it’s for you.

buggbugg – Aug 11, 2024
He used to be gorgeous and seemed to have a very successful modelling career ahead of him until a famous designer who shall not be named turned him into a Tina Head nympho butt slut. I was one of the designer’s assistants and took full advantage, but he quickly burnt out his looks, and that was mostly that.

Body Type Slim
Body Hair Little
Ethnicity Caucasian
Smoker Yes
Tattoos Yes
Piercings Yes
Languages French, English
Position More bottom
Dick XL – Uncut
Dirty WS only
Fisting Passive
S&M Yes
Kissing Yes
Hourly Rate 200€
Overnight Rate 1500€

 

______________

pimpingateen, 18
Harpers Ferry

I’m pimping out my teen school boy sissy son.
Only on Thursdays from midnight to Friday morning.
He’s a skinny blonde boy with brown eyes.
He goes both ways (yapper or non-verbal).
He’s all yours.

Guestbook of pimpingateen

pimpingateen (Owner) – Aug 1, 2024
He has a tight hole but I tell tops not to worry and just go for it.
Yes he screams but it’s only for the first 30 thrusts or so.

PiscesAquaDescendant – Aug 1, 2024
He was very standoffish at first but I paid him to huff until he was a dumb degenerate popperpigfag and then he was great. A million points.

MatureAndHairy – July 29, 2024
When he grows up he plans to start a business cutting hair for disabled folks!

pimpingateen (Owner) – July 27, 2024
If you are far away we are currently clearing out his clothes closet and some things are really too good to be thrown away.
Most of them are boxer shorts, worn, of course, and if you wish, he can add his BoyJuice.
There’s also a t-shirt with dried vomit down the front from when he got sick that we kept in case someone is interested.
I send vacuum-packed items by post.

Body Type Slim
Body Hair Little
Ethnicity Mixed
Smoker No
Tattoos No
Piercings No
Languages English
Position Versatile
Dick M – Cut
Dirty WS only
Fisting No answer
S&M Soft
Kissing Yes
Hourly Rate 200$
Overnight Rate On request

 

_____________




prettyboy2000x, 23
Basel

Ever thought about fucking an infamous pretty teen pornstar? ✨ I can get fucked hard. 💞 Check my Onlyfans or Pornhub if you don’t believe me.

📛 My whereabouts are known to at least 2 people and I know how to defend myself! 📛

⛔️ NO-GOs ⛔️

🚫 Me eating your ass. ⚠️
🚫 Cum in my mouth. ⚠️
🚫 Fingers, cock, tongue from my butt to my mouth. ⚠️
🚫 Expecting that I always cum. ⚠️
🚫 Becoming violent dispassionately with me. ⚠️
🚫 Misinterpreting my “Yes” or “NO”. ⚠️

Reasons for the NO-GOs are, that I have a weak immune system and get sick very easily.

Guestbook of prettyboy2000x

Latinlover49 – Aug 8, 2024
I strongly recommend that you make it a prerequisite that he’s already a “girl” before you show up. I didn’t, and knowing there was a dweeby little four-eyed nerd hiding under the fem slut made it very difficult to get hard.

Straightconversion – Aug 6, 2024
I’m 47 and have always been attracted to women only. However those photos of you are making me appreciate cock and arse and whatever else.

Body Type Slim
Body Hair Shaved
Ethnicity Caucasian
Smoker Yes
Tattoos No
Piercings No
Languages English, German
Position More bottom
Dick M – Uncut
Dirty Ask
Fisting Passive
S&M Soft
Kissing Yes
Hourly Rate On request
Overnight Rate On request

 

_____________

JeunePassifSoumis17, 18
Lyon

hello, I am a young passive submissive teenager. I wanna be a porn star but for now I can offer you something delicious without any hassle. I only have sex in cars but you will not be disappointed with the road, I promise 🤗.

Guestbook of JeunePassifSoumis17

JeunePassifSoumis17 (Owner) – Aug 9, 2024
Car drivers may be any legal age up to 90, any height, shape and size, from slim to very overweight, and any shape and size in between, any race, etc. If for some reason, one or more men wish to have one or more women present and/or to be involved in some way that is fine with me but I have sex with men only. But if any women are present, again they may be of any legal age up to 90, any height, any shape and size and any race.

Anonymous – Aug 9, 2024
Please satisy my wife email on [email protected]

Spareparts54311 – Aug 5, 2024
A friend of mine came by my place on Friday night and asked if I wanted to go for a drive. His car smelled like a back room at 4 am, and this boy was sitting in the back seat shirtless and drunk as a skunk. Let’s just say we didn’t get far before the car was parked. It was obvious I wasn’t the first passenger the car had seen that day, when I fucked him my cock came back with tiger stripes. Personally I thought he should background his day job and be a full time fuck meat. He’s not that cute and not very smart, let’s face it.

JeunePassifSoumis17 (Owner) – Aug 12, 2024
I don’t smoke weed but I sometimes drink a glass of whisky.

Body Type Slim
Body Hair Some
Ethnicity Arab
Smoker Yes
Tattoos Yes
Piercings No
Languages French, English
Position Bottom only
Dick L – Uncut
Dirty Ask
Fisting Active/Passive
S&M Soft
Kissing No
Hourly Rate 80€
Overnight Rate On request

 

_____________

PutIn-MyAss, 22
Brighton

Hi, I just don’t want to be a virgin anymore. Im excited, Im happy. Im outgoing, cheerful and curious. I have the feeling that I have enough enthusiasm to inspire the whole world! How do I talk to a man? Like I would to a woman? I could use all the guidance I can get.

Guestbook of PutIn-MyAss

blackleatherboots – Aug 6, 2024
He also looks a little like the young Wil Wheaton and I would have fucked Wil Wheaton until he was crippled.

Pppppppp – Aug 6, 2024
I’d use every skill I’ve learned, every talent that’s accrued to me, every single ounce of my ability to poz Ames McNamara.

KillianXXL – Aug 6, 2024
You remind me of that skinny fagboy actor on The Connors Ames McNamara. I would kill my family to blow my load in him but only after passing his skinny ass around to a bunch of hung men and gangfucking load after load into the bitch and then fistfucking his hole into a gaped out cavern.

Body Type Slim
Body Hair Little
Ethnicity Caucasian
Smoker No
Tattoos No
Piercings No
Languages English
Position Versatile
Dick M – Uncut
Dirty No
Fisting No
S&M No
Kissing Yes
Hourly Rate On request
Overnight Rate On request

 

_____________



onlysexmindplease, 19
Manchester

easy going just want to meet generous persons. would like to fuck if each other feels good.
A fan of chelsea but chelsea is really shit recent years.
really like civilization.
like teams chelsea and bayern would like to talk football all in all everything is okay hahaha life is to talk with different people and have more thought to the world right?😉
face photos must at first if you think I am hot then you can show me your face would like to meet with any age.
very emotional sometimes. I am sorry and very sensitive
sex needs both to spend attention and time. why someone wants to fuck me first but ok I always so passive.
not in Germany not in Germany!
if you not active in sex dont text me dont waste our time.
if you want to sex just be active if I am interested I will sex sometimes bad mood so dont want to talk hope understand thanks.
Tuchel please go to hell. If you are not fit to coach Bayern, please stop. You really turned Bayern into a piece of shit. Why did you buy such a vegetable as Dell? Why did you let Dale cross? He’s so bad at it. Why not sell Sane? He doesn’t even pass to Kane.
Thanks god Chelsea beat Manchester United.
Bayern go to hell, you are a piece of shit now, why did Tuchel pretend to be a professional coach?
Even if Bayern lost, we can see the direction. Maybe Tuhel is really not suitable to be a coach. When a back cramp occurs, he still chooses to continue rather than change. The back is very important to a football match. It is this small mistake that leads to the mistakes behind. I hope Bayern is getting better and better. Buy some good players in summer and change a good coach. Harry Kane deserves a champion.

Guestbook of onlysexmindplease

Dackman – Aug 10, 2024
No words can describe his perfection.

Body Type Athletic
Body Hair Smooth
Ethnicity Caucasian
Smoker No
Tattoos No
Piercings No
Languages English, German
Position More bottom
Dick L – Uncut
Dirty No answer
Fisting Passive
S&M Ask
Kissing Ask
Hourly Rate 300€
Overnight Rate 1400€

 

____________

HARD-WORKER, 19
Coachella

I am a budding but motivated hobby whore. Due to my private life I am not always available. Therefore, I will announce dates on which I book a motel room and can be visited there for 1-2 days.

Blowjob/rimjob: 25 €
Anal: 100 €
Gangbang/group: 200 € per person
Whole night: 2500 €

– Extras: me squirting (+25 €), me upchucking (+25 €), fisting (+50 €), bondage (+50 €), choking/punching (+50 €), anal free4all (+100 €)

I’m also starting an OF and of course I need material for it. That means I am also looking for men with whom I can shoot porn. When shooting porn, everything is free of course 🙂

payment in advance💵

Guestbook of HARD-WORKER

1982Tom – Aug 3, 2024
The perfect magnet.
It’s hard to get over it.

PigNoseSculptor – July 30, 2024
I’m very fetishist of the nose. Especially boys with a pig nose like this one. I like to twist and bend their noses until their nostrils clearly are exposed like a pig. I worked his nose to enlarge it and make very flexible nostrils. No communication, no sex, just his great nostrils flaring wide.

fondant – July 28, 2024
I confirm that Pacco likes to get on all fours and spread his petit buttcheeks and show off his impeccable and flexible hole for long work opening (tongue, fingers, dildos, cock) and finishing very dilated and its wild, coruscated depths photographed at very close range.

HARD-WORKER (Owner) – July 27, 2024
I just quit my job. Fuck those bitches.

close_now_closer – July 20, 2024
I only like boys who drink vodka, and he drinks lots of vodka.

melitin – July 18, 2024
Pacco is not just hot, he is generous. And his generosity is beyond calculation.

Body Type Slim
Body Hair Some
Ethnicity Latino
Smoker Yes
Tattoos Yes
Piercings No
Languages English, Spanish
Position Versatile
Dick L – Uncut
Dirty Yes
Fisting Active/Passive
S&M Yes
Kissing Yes
Hourly Rate On request
Overnight Rate On request

 

____________



i_search_you, 22
Berlin

Berlin boy doing this out of financial struggles but I know how to party hard and hot sex is my first, last and middle name.

If you want to fly higher 🏏 than the jets and experiment on me and lose your mind only at my place or your place 💄

I am so super sexy and my butt is of an exciting and divine and immaculate beauty and flawlessly spruce.

I’m so great in bed that even I myself get dumbstruck when I think about the ways I’m able to drive men insane during sex.

Guestbook of i_search_you

wantlovelyboy – Aug 10, 2024
He’s a scotch on the rocks.

Whatsuphoe – Aug 7, 2024
a tacky person, but his ass is a landmark

KevX75 – Aug 5, 2024
Kiss him like you miss him, fuck him like you hate him. And when you’re fucking someone else just fuck them like they ain’t him.

HornyHawk – Aug 4, 2024
Once you get him in whore mode (drugs) he will do just about anything you want including fucking your dog(s) if you have any.

pragmaticnihilist – Aug 2, 2024
You can put your cock !!!!AND HAND!!!! up his ass 🫠 and wank 💓 💦👄 inside him! 💓

Body Type Slim
Body Hair Some
Ethnicity Mixed
Smoker Yes
Tattoos Yes
Piercings Yes
Languages German, English
Position More bottom
Dick M – Uncut
Dirty Ask
Fisting Active/Passive
S&M Yes
Kissing Consent
Hourly Rate 100€
Overnight Rate 600€

 

_____________

Sexy_boy_4_Daddy, 19
Knoxville

I am a young adult of 19 years.

I love video games and doing mushrooms and sex.

Guestbook of Sexy_boy_4_Daddy

Alwaysshorny – Aug 13, 2024
I remember the day you switched from grinder to the escort sites and that was a sad day.

JohnLennon – Aug 11, 2024
i had the most unbelievable sex experience of my life with mike. we did mushrooms which was the first time for me. the result was crazy. i fucked every hole he has with desperation. i would’ve fucked his nostrils if i could’ve. we kept going for 5 hours non stop. i drank his cum like i’d been wandering lost in the desert my whole life.

Sexy_boy_4_Daddy (Owner) – Aug 9, 2024
Apple will invent skynet.

Couplefree – Aug 6, 2024
Very straight laced looking, thick southern accent, polite and quiet on the outside, thunderous and hot on the inside, my bf and I impregnated him 8 times.

Body Type Average
Body Hair Not very hairy
Ethnicity Caucasian
Smoker No
Tattoos No
Piercings No
Languages English
Position Versatile
Dick L – Cut
Dirty WS only
Fisting Active/Passive
S&M Soft
Kissing Yes
Hourly Rate 100€
Overnight Rate On request

 

_____________


burn_it_down, 24
Houston

Let do it over night however many hours you want for $5.

Guestbook of burn_it_down

Phallarchist – Aug 5, 2024
All boys should be required to watch their sperm in motion, to impress upon them the awesome power of creation they hold between their legs and inspire them to expel it with pride and determination.

ijustlikesex – Aug 4, 2024
Before my date with him, my sixth sense told me that he was going to be a whole lot more work than his give-it-away price suggests, so I came prepared. Thank god because I had to move heaven and earth to get him to lie still and shut up but once freed of his idiotic jabbering and donkey laugh his face was incredibly cute and I spent many wonderful inexpensive hours with it.

Body Type Athletic
Body Hair Shaved
Ethnicity Caucasian
Smoker Yes
Tattoos Yes
Piercings Yes
Languages English
Position More bottom
Dick XL – Uncut
Dirty Yes
Fisting Active/Passive
S&M Yes
Kissing Consent
Hourly Rate On request
Overnight Rate 5$

 

_____________

BottomOfTheBarrel, 18
Nijmegen

My boyfriend is a closeted teen who sneaks away to live out his secret piggy gay bottom fantasies with me. I’m looking for a third who comes over and makes him take dick from a total stranger. We’ve never done this before and it will be a total shock to him, but I’m gambling it’ll be the reality check he needs to drop the bro act and accept who he is really is. My idea is we’ll fuck him together and then, if you want, you can fuck him alone for as long as you want. Pound him hard. Breed him. Kiss him. Fuck him until he can’t feel his body, until he can’t cum anymore and until he can’t speak properly. Please don’t hold back. But I’m going to have to charge you, I’m afraid. No exceptions.

Guestbook of BottomOfTheBarrel

BottomOfTheBarrel (Owner) – Aug 9, 2024
Long story short my bf and I are now in a sugardaddy arrangement with an older dude. He has my bf on lockdown meaning he’s not allowed to do butt stuff and he’s not allowed to be given head or give head. He’s somewhat allowed to fool around. I know, harsh, but he’s paying our bills.

livelaughlube – July 30, 2024
Spit in his mouth and tell him he’s pretty.

BikerBikerBiker – July 25, 2024
He is tense, wary like an abandoned rescue pet, and inadvertently sexy as hell. He has an everyteen ass and thin, lengthy cock that sproings into action and is as suckable as candy. He has the ambition to be a pop-punk singer. We must encourage him to have a flamboyant youth because he has his whole life ahead of him.

Body Type Slim
Body Hair Smooth
Ethnicity Caucasian
Smoker Yes
Tattoos No
Piercings No
Languages Dutch, English
Position More bottom
Dick M – Uncut
Dirty No
Fisting Ask
S&M Soft
Kissing No
Hourly Rate 250€
Overnight Rate 800€

 

____________


DisasterMoon, 19
Zagreb

you must be taller than myself and weigh more than 210 pounds. now who wanna suck my pu$$y💥💥

btw i’m straight, i know i can believe it myself

Guestbook of DisasterMoon

StoopidFaggot – Aug 6, 2024
He let me suck his pussy in return for mooching cigarettes off me. That’s all I got for now.

Verpoorten – Aug 3, 2024
I’m gay because I like young ass. His was as uncomplicated and hot as possible. That’s why there are no long treatises, no song lyrics and no poems here.

Anonymous – Aug 1, 2024
He rolled himself into a ball and pried his asshole open and sucked his own dick while I ate his ass and came like a wild man. I must remain anonymous because I play tennis professionally and I know a lot of people.

Body Type Slim
Body Hair Not very hairy
Ethnicity Caucasian
Smoker Yes
Tattoos No
Piercings No
Languages Croatian, English, German
Position Top only
Dick M – Uncut
Dirty Yes
Fisting No
S&M Soft
Kissing Yes
Hourly Rate 50€
Overnight Rate 300€

 

*

p.s. Hey. I’m the guest on the new episode of the great Wake Island podcast if you want to hear me. Warning: we talk a lot about Halloween home haunts. Here ** Darby🫠, Hey, Darbs. Yes, Iceland, amazing. No, Iceland’s pretty up on vegan eating requirements, so I didn’t have to go into any trad. Icelandic eating place, thankfully. Anyway, if you ever get a chance to go to Iceland, seriously go. But don’t stay in Reykjavik, travel around. Awesome about your seemingly great new friends. New great friends: best thing ever? Quite possibly. October’s approach is the only reason I am perky. ** jay, No, no one complained, so I’m not sure what the problem was. Hopefully a quick, resolved glitch. Serpents Tail, my old UK publisher, is reprinting some of their older, o.o.p. titles, and ‘Closer’ got picked. I don’t know of any plans by them to reprint the other Cycle books. I wonder where that attraction comes from, but, yeah, it’s real, it’s there. ** Poecilia, Hi! Yeah, commenters here are given very limited options, which really sucks. A WordPress thing, I guess. There’s no internal function available that would let me improve the commenting experience, unfortunately. Thank you for the kinds words about ‘Permanent Green Light’, and that scene. Poor Sylvain (the actor) was very good at hiding the fact that he was freezing to death. And, wow, I saw the drawings via the links you passed on to jay. They’re beautiful. They’re amazing. Thank you so incredibly much. You’re way really talented. Obviously you’re an artist. What is your other art like? Thank you so kindly, P! ** David Ehrenstein, Yes, an offspring but sadly one who did not inherit even their level of talent. ** _Black_Acrylic, Ha ha, Warren’s stuff is pretty bad, although it’s hard to imagine an art crowd sitting still for his rather dullard (if strangely likeable) incompetence for the duration. Never heard of Neil Breen, no. Seems like I should have. I’ll obviously investigate him. Wow, that trailer makes him seem like a possible weird genius or something. No? ** Lucas, Hi. Well, it’s a little bit silly, but Maus us Chocolat is actually pretty cool. Geister Rikscha is very old school and kind of dated, but I liked it, and it’s very peaceful. Hm, those are the only dark rides I can think of that you probably haven’t already done? If you come at Xmas, you can have a Buche de Noel! I live for their annual appearance. Oh, yes, so sorry to be so slow. I’ll read your short thing today. Thanks for the nudge. I very often need nudges. xo. ** nat, Hi. Warren’s stuff is pretty boring, but if you watch them with your finger hovering near the Fast Forward button, there’s charmingly shitty stuff littered throughout. I guess we should all be grateful that real life still has the power to lure us from our imaginative realm. Uh, I say don’t bother with ‘A Little Life’, but, really, what do I know? I like refrains, so no problem whatsoever. ** Måns BT, Hey, Måns! Welcome back! I figured you were heavily preoccupied with the festival and its surroundings, which, you know, is exciting. Yes, I’m a ‘Twin Peaks’ fan, of course. I’m in the ‘best TV series or TV anything ever’ camp. Weirdly, and for no reason whatsoever other than my worries about my writing time getting eaten up, I still have not watched ‘The Return’, which is literally insane of me. I’ll try to use your prompt as my trigger to do so. Life was hampered recently by a terrible heatwave, but now it’s gone (I sure hope). Upcoming … my pal Zac should return from vacation which will occasion us trying to solve the huge problems around our film. Gonna see some friends who are also finally filtering back from their vacations. I finally figured out how to watch ‘Aggro Drift’, so I’ll do that. We’ll see, otherwise. The festival sounds very cool indeed! I don’t know ‘Justine och Juliette’, but I will endeavour to. Thank you about ‘Jerk’. Jonathan is absolutely incredible, I think. It’s great to have you back, yes! I look forward to more. xo. ** Charalampos, Hey. Thanks for listening to the podcast. I’m not on instagram, and I didn’t know they posted ‘RT’ stills. Huh. The photo of Dima is/was him, yes. There used to be tons of porn of him out there, but I don’t know if they’re still posted anywhere. Vibeage galore from gradually chilling Paris. ** Steve, Hi. No, I never saw the Cockettes live. Maybe he’s in their film? I did see that. Congrats on the laptop’s revival. I’ve only seen that Neil Breen trailer that Ben posted, but it looked totally nuts, and I’m curious. ** Justin D, Hi. Someone really needs to invent a time machine but I guess be very, very careful about who gets to use it. Like you and me and our respective friends, basically. ‘Falcon Lake’ does look really interesting in that trailer. I’ll see if it’s on my ‘illegal’ site. Thanks! Wednesday was one for the books if books include empty blank books. Enjoy your Thursday maximally. ** Harper, Hey. I generally only watch pirated films as a last ditch, unless they’re ‘blockbusters’ or whatever. But Zac’s and my films are on a few pirate sites, and that doesn’t bother me at all. They don’t generate any money for us anyway. I’m definitely on the ‘Fateful Findings’ tip. There must be a way. I can see the Ed Wood as genius argument. Certainly in relation to, say, Jerry Warren where there’s really just kind of nothing. ** PL, Hi, PL. Of course I remember you, it hasn’t been that long. Maybe you were referring to ‘Glen or Glenda’, which Harper coincidentally mentioned, like, an inch above you? I know Chucky, yes. Nice … kid. Things with me are slow, but it’s summer, so that’s that. Glad you’ve been focused on the short film. I’m sure you’re making more progress than Zac and I have been able to make ours recently. What?! That video … what in the world? How did that happen? What a strange fantasy. That is crazy. I mean, you know, my apartment is about the size of that place’s bathroom. Thanks for the weird look-see. ** Nicholas., I actually know that Arca song. What were the odds. I don’t know the Grimes song, but I’ll search it out. Nothing is hugely up over here. Your nap/underwear combo wins. Hm, I never buy anything except food and cigarettes. And books. I’m like a monk or something. So … I did buy some discounted socks, but that was like 6 months ago. They’re already full of holes. I’ll try out that song you’re obsessed with as soon as this thing is launched. Thanks! ** Oscar 🌀, Prayers that it will fall. I dreamt last night that I was at Disneyland, and I was looking into the wishing well where people throw their coins and Tinkerbelle yoo-hoos from the depths when they do, and I was looking at the coins, and there was this one configuration that seemed to be spelling out something, and I thought, ‘Could that be my ‘Hi Oscar’ candidate for tomorrow (aka today)’, but, just as I was looking more closely at the configuration to find out, Goofy showed up in a very dehydrated state and started lapping madly at the well’s water, totally destroying the configuration’s visibility, and I waited and waited for him to drink his fill, but I woke up before he did. Sad. Dude, what’s a little ouch in return for your freedom! Congratulations! You were right the first time: escorts, at your service. ** Okay. As you can see from the sight up above, it’s the middle of the month. Please do whatever you do here in the middle of month, and I’ll see you tomorrow.

Jerry Warren Day

 

“I was in the business to make money. I never, ever tried in any way to compete, or to make something worthwhile. I only did enough to get by, so they would buy it, so it would play, and so I’d get a few dollars. It’s not very fair to the public, I guess, but that was my attitude…You didn’t have to go all out and make a really good picture.” — Jerry Warren

‘One person’s filmography I was decidedly not in a big rush to get back to was Jerry Warren’s. He holds the distinction here of being one of the only directors to make multiple NO STAR-rated films not even fit for bad movie connoisseur consumption. Furthermore, Warren himself flat out admitted he had zero interest in making good or entertaining films, which I guess makes him a cinematic charlatan of sorts. He was in the business solely to make money, which required cheap as possible investments on what he hoped would be big returns. That’s his entire dispassionate career in a nutshell. While I’ll never begrudge anyone trying to make an honest living, what Warren was doing ventured more into the realm of hucksterism.

‘Any filmmaker who’s worth a damn is either an artist or someone at least attempting to make enjoyable product for consumers. Warren was neither. His usual routine consisted of buying the distribution rights to unreleased-in-the-U.S. foreign films, having them hacked up and re-dubbed (or simply narrated over) and adding cheap, talky scenes featuring American actors so he had names to put on the poster to lure in unsuspecting genre fans. In doing so, he simultaneously destroyed the original director’s work, showed genuine contempt for his target audience and became quite possibly the laziest director to have ever walked the face of the Earth.

‘Though most of his work was pilfered material, Warren did make a handful of his own films. These included the God awful bore TEENAGE ZOMBIES (1959), the almost tolerable THE INCREDIBLE PETRIFIED WORLD (1959), FRANKENSTEIN ISLAND (1981), which I’ve not yet seen, and MAN BEAST (1956), which was also his directorial debut. Still, even most of these “original” works depended strongly on recycled stock footage to fill in the budget gaps and boost the running time, and this barely hour-long effort is no exception.’ — The Bloody Pit of Horror

‘Jerry Warren seems to have been largely overlooked in the chronicles of Bad Cinema (As usual, Jabootu.com has seen this glaring omission and done a great job of addressing it). Far more attention has been lavished on Ed Wood, if only because he was a much more colorful character, whose movies generally have a far higher camp value than Warren’s. But Warren’s output shows him to be a far more likely candidate for the “Worst Director of All Time” than Wood.

‘Both Wood and Warren copied the trivial details of other genre films without understanding the deeper reasons for those movies’ success. Warren usually had access to a… well, a more lively class of actors than Wood did — actors who were at least able to interpret their lines instead of reading them by rote. Still, Warren’s results are far less entertaining, often because he blocks his scenes so that his actors can barely move at all. Both Warren and Wood were terrible writers; but Wood’s bizarre and senseless ramblings are pure surrealist poetry compared to Warren’s dialogue, which is usually merely boring.

‘But Warren sinks lowest when you compare what each director did with other people’s images. True, Wood is legendary for his inappropriate use of stock footage. In Glen or Glenda?, for instance, he includes a few seconds of stampeding buffalo while Béla Lugosi shouts, “Pull de string!” Sometimes the footage is inadvertently appropriate, if equally ridiculous: in the same movie, as two off-screen steelworkers talk about transvestites, we’re shown machinery clipping off phallic steel ingots. While Wood weakened his own movies with ludicrous inserts, Warren did the opposite: he took other people’s entire movies and destroyed them with footage of his own.’ — Braineater

 

____
Stills

















































 

____
Further

Jerry Warren @ IMDb
Jerry Warren: Cinema’s Own Dr. Frankenstein
Jerry Warren – A Biography
THE FILMS OF JERRY WARREN
Jerry Warren @ Letterboxd
The HORROR And SCI-FI MOVIES Of JERRY WARREN
Curse of the Stone Hand – Braineater.com!
The Jerry Warren Collection
A delicate bouquet of old gym socks….Mr. Jerry Warren
Man Beast @ The Bloody Pit of Horror
The Worst Director of All Time With More Than One Film
Attack of the Mayan Mummy @ Psychotronica Redux
It’s amazing what can be accomplished by a simple blow to the head.

 

____
Extras


Jerry Warren Collection Vol. 1


Jerry Warren Collection Vol. 2


Joe Dante on THE INCREDIBLE PETRIFIED WORLD

 

__
Bio
from Search My Trash

 

Jerry Warren was born in 1925, in Los Angeles, California. Little is known about his early life, but sometime in his late teens/early 20’s, the movie bug must have bitten him, and he started out as a bit player, appearing in films like the Chic Johnson/Ole Olsen comedy Ghost Catchers (1944, Edward F.Cline) and who knows how many other films. Unfortunately though, Warren wasn’t much of an actor, so he never got past “uncredited”-status. However, Warren used his days as a bit-player to learn plenty about the film business, and eventually he came to the conclusion if he wanted real power in movies, he had to become a producer/director …

Jerry Warren it seems had found just the right time to make his dreams of becoming a producer/director reality: The mid-1950’s. This was a time when the studio system was at its weakest yet drive-ins from all over the country were in bad need of films to sell to their teenage crowd. Drive-in owners in these days were not all that peculiar about quality of the fare they were showing, since their teenaged patrons were a rather undistinguishing crowd that came to have fun with their friends, get past first base with their partners of the opposite sex on their cars’ backseats, and maybe party a bit. They wanted movies that had an easy-to-follow story, a few cheap thrills, and a sensationalist plotline that promised something this then new medium, television, would not show. Actual quality hardly ever came into this equation.

Like Roger Corman and others, Jerry Warren was quick to realize that movies could be sold on their poster-motives and titles alone, and if you had a good poster, you didn’t have to worry about the film attached to it all that much anymore – which was of course an invaluable fact to know for any low budget producer (and Jerry Warren always was his own moneyman) since it took pressure of actual production-values and allowed more shortcuts.
Why is that?

Because as long as the posters at the drive-in promised the teenage crowd the stuff they wanted to see, they would come, and if you didn’t show a total bomb, they wouldn’t complain. Point is that the drive-ins were more of a social gathering ground to begin with, and not too many teenagers actually came for a particular film or were interested in a particular director. One was just going to the drive-in because everybody else was there, too …

One interesting and little-known fact about Jerry Warren’s career is that he not only was a director/producer and general jack-of-all-trades on his movies (after all, personnel doesn’t come in cheap and why pay someone to do something you can do yourself?), no, in 1959 he also recorded two hit singles, Street of Love and Monkey Walk, as Jerry Warren and his Pets. Now of course, Warren was no Elvis Presley, but his tunes were not half bad, songs targeted at the same teenage audience that went to see his films, and they were at least moderately successful.

With House of the Black Death, Warren ultimately left the realm of cut-and-paste filmmaking to make what many consider to be the ultimate Jerry Warren film (though it’s not all that typical for his body of work) while others consider it the worst movie of all time (which it isn’t – though it’s bad enough) while yet others simply don’t get it: The Wild World of Batwoman (1966). The Wild World of Batwoman is essentially about a bunch of bad guys trying to steal an all-powerful hearing aide (!) and the attempts of superheroine Batwoman (as played by Katherine Victor) and her bikini-clad Batgirls to keep it out of their hands – and in the end, the all-powerful hearing aide turns into an all-powerful bomb, too.

The main mistake many people make concerning The Wild World of Batwoman is to take it seriuosly, which it was never intended to be – actually, the film was more of an hommage to/rip-off of/cash-in on the then extremely popular Batman TV-series starring Adam West, itself a masterpiece of campy and surreal nonsense. And made on a way tighter budget than the series, Warren’s film tries to duplicate its over-the-top ideas – and yet fails, at times even miserably, mainly because humour was never Jerry Warren’s forte and because what was campy in the original is only childish here.

Possibly out of frustration over the events surrounding The Wild World of Batwoman, Jerry Warren pulled out of the film business after the release of that film as She was a Hippy Vampire to concentrate on other business options … but then again, what goes for every self-respecting zombie also goes for almost all of the more eccentric figureheads of the horror genre: You can’t keep a good man down – and thus in 1981, when he was pretty much forgotten by his fans of old (which were not all that many) and before rediscovery of films like his on home video kicked in, he out of the blue released a new film, 15 years after his last one, and yet he had assembled most of his regulars from yesteryear again, like Katherine Victor, Robert Clarke, even John Carradine and frequent Jerry Warren-guest star Steve Brodie, plus veteran B-actor Cameron Mitchell, a newcomer to Warren’s cinematic realm.

The film in question, Frankenstein Island, is a story about a group of balloonists stranded on an island full of bikini-clad girls and monsters and controlled by the daughter (Katherine Victor) of Frankenstein (John Carradine), who is with her as a ghost – and it is pure narrative madness, but it’s also a great (and unintentional?) hommage by Jerry Warren to himself: in its mix-and-mash structure of story- and genre-elements it is reminiscent of Warren’s cut-and-paste-movies, while its unrestrained throwing around of pulp clichés can be traced back to The Wild World of Batwoman, and yet storywise, the film is remarkably similar to Teenage Zombies, with Katherine Victor even playing a similar role in both movies. The outcome of this strange blend is of course utter trash and maybe one of the worst movies Warren has ever made – and at the same time, it’s simply hilarious and a film that’s hard to top in terms of low-budget outrageousness …

Of course though, the early 1980’s were no longer the 1950’s, and by 1981, Warren’s directorial style seemed terribly outdated, as low budget filmmaking had moved on from 1950’s drive-in routines quite significantly – so the film failed to find a large audience (though it has probably made its money back on home video). Warren could not help but notice his time as a filmmaker was over, and he never shot another film. He died from cancer in Escondido, California, 1988, at the age of just 63. But as unlikely as it seemed during his lifetime, probably, his films, with all their obvious, undeniable flaws, have lived on since then and will continue to do so for quite a while now, at least as long as there are trash movie lovers like myself.

 

____________
Jerry Warren’s 12 films

____________
Man Beast (1956)
‘This was Jerry Warren’s first film. Which makes it much harder to explain why it was so much better than most — or perhaps, nearly all — of his films that followed. In fact, he followed it up with the exceedingly dull Teenage Zombies. Go figure. Now don’t get the wrong idea here: this is an impressively cheap film, with lots of recycled stock footage, a lot of obviously studio bound scenes (mostly in tents), and lots of talk. Lots and lots and lots of talk. But the end result is something Jerry usually only aspired to: an entertaining, if minor, B-Movie. I suspect Jerry may have picked his actors because they resembled those in his stock footage climbing scenes (from an unfinished Russian film, according to Bill Warren) as they match reasonably well. But the strangest part of this one is the opening credits, which give top billing to Rock Madison. Who never appears in the film. Jerry claimed that Rock (whose only other credit was in one other Jerry Warren film — and doesn’t appear in it, either) appeared in scenes that ended up on the cutting room floor. However, the general consensus is that Jerry didn’t think his cast sounded impressive enough and added another (phony) name.’ — Mark Cole

the entire film

 

_____________
The Incredible Petrified World (1959)
‘When the cable breaks on their diving bell four people find themselves trapped in a hidden underwater world. None of the following words describe this film. Overlooking the tedious opening and narration, the story initially offered potential with a competent cast and a deep see dive that immediately went wrong. Unfortunately the pace soon meandered, leaving a lacklustre cave meander. A reasonable story still could surface, yet unfortunately nothing of interest transpired.’ — Ian A. Chapman


the entire film

 

_____________
Teenage Zombies (1959)
‘Jerry Warren, my personal touchstone as the worst director in history, is paired up again with star Katherine ‘Batwoman’ Victor this time in a story of alleged international intrigue. It all involves Victor, a mad scientist, making some mind control capsules on an island which despite being clearly visible from shore, is unknown to everyone but the bad guys. Teenage heroes inadvertently foil the caper and defeat evil in a manner which is comical, yet difficult to comprehend. (When is it a good idea to break INTO jail?) Please also enjoy the ongoing verbal jousting concerning the relative merits of horseback riding versus water skiing! What does this have to do with the plot? Who knows! How prominent is this debate in the film? Very!’ — Robert I. Hedges


the entire film

 

_____________
Terror Of The Bloodhunters (1962)
‘Jerry Warren is (in-)famous for taking bad foreign films, re-dubbing them and adding or re-shooting or re-arranging or whatever to produce a totally incomprehensible film that is always much worse than anything he ever started out with!!! TERROR OF THE BLOOD HUNTERS(1962) stars Robert Clarke (HIDEOUS SUN DEMON, BEYOND THE TIME BARRIER and MAN FROM PLANET X, the last two directed by cult favorite Edgar Ulmer) as a political/psychological writer/artist imprisoned on Devil’s Island who escapes with the warden’s daughter and a fellow inmate only to be tracked through stock-footage jungles by the guard who wants to marry the girl. It’s all really pretty bad, yet still bad in a fascinating unexplainable way. For a Jerry Warren film this one makes more sense than most and even progresses in a somewhat normal fashion once the actual chase is on, but it’s still a stinker.’ — Richard J. Oravitz

the entire film

 

_____________
The Violent and the Damned (1962)
‘Here’s another hack-a-thon from Jerry Warren. In this film, a group of men sit around talking about men in prison. We then go to an actual prison where the inmates take over and escape. THE VIOLENT AND THE DAMNED is yet another film that Warren hacked together out of other movies. The original movie was 1955’s MAOS SANGRENTAS from Brazil and from what I’ve gathered it clocked in at a hour. This Warren picture features a new opening with some of Warren’s crew and then we get to the original movie, which has been dubbed. The “new” version clocks in at just 57-minutes but it feels much longer.’ — Michael Elliott


the entire film

 

_____________
Attack of the Mayan Mummy (1964)
‘Jerry Warren strikes again: the notorious schlock filmmaker takes a bunch of footage from Mexicos’ “The Aztec Mummy”, and adds interminable scenes, dialogue, and narration of his own. The “story” deals with an expedition to a pyramid, and experiments into regression and reincarnation. A woman named Ann Taylor recalls her past life, after which various scientists and treasure hunters go in search of gold. I understand that the original “Aztec Mummy” is supposed to be good for some entertainment, but as usual, Warren does the source material no favours by editing it and utilizing it the way that he does.’ — Hey_Sweden


the entire film

 

_____________
Face of the Screaming Werewolf (1964)
Face of the Screaming Werewolf is a chaotic nightmare fugue that would cause most people to give up after twelve minutes. But I’m not most people. And hopefully, neither are you. Comprised of pieces from two Mexican horror movies (La Casa del Terror and La Momia Azteca) and new footage featuring Chaney, Face has been ridiculed and dismissed for over fifty years. I get it. This movie is confusing and filled with technical mistakes. It features lengthy sequences of people sitting in a living room and talking. But Face has less in common with Warren’s other cut-and-paste experiments, like Curse of the Stone Hand, and more in common with Guy Maddin’s The Green Fog; this is found footage with a mind of its own, and we never know where it will lead us. So it’s best to hop on the stream-of-consciousness journey and lose ourselves in the experience.’ — Joseph A. Ziemba

the entire film

 

____________
Curse of the Stone Hand (1964)
‘Sure, as a film, it’s terrible. But as collage art? Two films from Chile dripping with gothic atmosphere, but carelessly abused and carved apart for their imagery alone, then raw voiceover and dubbing slathered over them, and knit together with a few scenes of John Carradine and Katherine Victor hastily filmed and spliced in, a Frankenstein’s Monster bringing to life a barely coherent story about different people (and therefore different movies) inhabiting a house filled with mysterious stone hands. The first, a man who enters a suicide club in order to gamble to win himself out of debt, the second, a man who dominates those around him and turns into a demon – or at least, draws portraits of himself turning into a demon. The visuals are stunning, the audio terrible, and the inserts amusing. Outsider art from Jerry Warren, a guy who saw people making a buck from producing movies and wanted a slice of the action.’ — threepenny


the entire film

 

_____________
Creature of the Walking Dead (1965)
‘Warren got his hands on a decent, if unremarkable, Mexican horror flick called La Marca del Muerto/The Mark of Death, directed by Fernando Cortes (the original movie seems to have disappeared without trace: even the IMDB’s entry for La Marca del Muerto lists only Warren’s version). Judging from what’s left in Warren’s cut, La Marca… seems to have been a fairly atmospheric variation on the theme of H.P. Lovecraft’s Case of Charles Dexter Ward: a young man summons his own ancestor from beyond the grave, only to have the fiend steal his identity as he continues the search for eternal life. The normal thing for a US distributor to do with a Mexican import would be to strip off the Spanish dialog and dub it into English as badly as possible. This is not Warren’s style. Instead, Warren inserts his own, totally unrelated footage, while removing enough of the original film to make it completely incomprehensible. But the kicker is that Warren does all this because he thinks he’s creating a convincing narrative structure! In Warren’s own, twisted view, he’s making a movie that’s perfectly clear, and that holds together better than the original. In fact, he’s done everything possible to create an anti-film, a movie that works on no level at all.’ — Braineater


the entire film

 

______________
House of the Black Death (1965)
‘So it kinda starts enjoyably B-movie but then slows its pace down to the point where you’re like “you’re the most boring Satanists”. Some people get stuck at a villa I guess with babushka Lon Chaney Jr hobbling around getting called out for a fraud of a cult leader, there’s the threat of a werewolf who turns into a (chimp?!!!) during the the climatic scene only to have a weird edit and then he’s dead?? There’s a lot of unrealized scenes and overall bad effects which gives it a real Ed Wood feeling without the charm. Several belly dancing scenes while at the alter of Satan. John Carradine as the most loyal Satanist working with the guy with the magical cross to defeat babushka Lon Chaney Jr. I dunno guys, this was a mess.’ — Bob McQueen


the entire film

 

_____________
Wild World of Batwoman (1966)
‘Holy rip-off! At the 1960s height of Batmania, schlock movie master Jerry Warren concocted this way-out tale of Batwoman (Katherine Victor with a bat drawn on her chest with eyeliner), a distaff crimefighter who, with her Bat Girls, is hired to protect the Ajax Development Company’s newest invention, an atomic hearing aid, from the arch-villain Ratfink. “Wonderfully woeful and thoroughly brain-dead”.’ — The Phantom of the Movies.


the entire film

 

_____________
Frankenstein Island (1981)
‘Anyone who tells you they know what this movie is about is lying. There is something to be said for the sheer amount of ridiculous ideas this thing throws at the wall. Regrettably, Frankenstein Island has almost no capacity to follow through with any of it. Except maybe Steve Brodie being the world’s jolliest drunken sailor. Otherwise, it’s 95 minutes of random ideas done as cheaply and nonsensically as possible.’ — Curtis


the entire film

 

 

*

p.s. Hey. ** jay, Hi. Oh, sure, the Pikmans are excellent games, and masterminded by the god Miyamoto himself. Piracy doesn’t bother me. I’m a serial offender myself. I personally think pale, shaken people are the most attractive, so I’ll happily take some credit for your successful relationship. I’m hoping the imminent Paralympics will be insane, but I kind of doubt it. Thanks! I hope for some environmental insanity for you too, if that sounds appealing. ** _Black_Acrylic, I remember when scenes were coughing up Commie graphics fondly. Scorchio … that’s nice, that might roll effectively off the tongue. Let me try, and I’ll report back. ** Poecilia, Hi, Poecilia! It’s a great pleasure to cross paths with you. I don’t know where I’d be without Archive.Org. How interesting that you wanted to compare and contrast those two pieces. Fictionalising that real life situation made me feel very uncomfortable, which, you know, was the point, I guess. Eight months?! Wow, where are you located that a ‘Frisk’ is so extremely far-flung. Thank you ever so much for your diligence. I’m honored. I don’t know how much Amazon takes, but I suppose it’s a chunk, and then my publisher takes a chunk, and I eventually wind up with a pittance basically. I really don’t make hardly any money from the sales of my books, and I really just want people to have access to them and read them, so I’m not bothered by the piracy at all. In fact I’m grateful for it. You’re an excellent example of why it’s only a good thing. Oh, wow, I would be ultra-thrilled to receive fan art in any form that the person who made it wanted me to have it. I’m not on instagram, but maybe I’d be allowed to glimpse it that way? I’m on Facebook. Or one could email it to me? Or, yeah, snail mail it. I would be amazed to see such a thing by any of those methods. And if you’re hinting that you made something out of what I do, I’m so grateful. I’d be very interested and curious to know more about you and yours if you feel like sharing. In any case, thank you so much! ** David Ehrenstein, Very happy you like them, sir. ** Lucas, Howdy, L! So nice that you like her work, and your friend too. If you end up doing Taron and like it, Black Mamba is quite good too. I suppose rollerskating rinks probably don’t exist anymore except maybe in small American towns? I would assume their physical largesse and the paucity of rollerskating kids would make such a venture unsustainable. Moonlight Rollerway is now a Walmart. It’s back to a normal okayish late summer temperature here, so I’m thinking/hoping you can’t be too far behind? No, thanks for the nudge, I haven’t gotten tickets yet. Paris in November is Paris at one of its most inviting periods. Not to mention that it’ll be so awesome to see you! ** Harper, Hey. I’m happy you’re feeling better. It’s so weird how a mere 24 hours can rewrite one. Or maybe not, but it seems strange. Yes, I agree, it’s the effort and doing that’s absolutely what matters. I have days where I just write one really good sentence, and it can feel like Xmas. ** Uday, Seal the deal. Sylvester was actually quite a tall, bulky guy, and physical grace when excited by music was not his forte. You’re near a cave. That’s exciting, well, I guess depending on the cave. When I was growing up, I lived near the ‘cave’ under Wayne Manor in the old 60s ‘Batman’ TV show, but when I excitedly went to explore it, it was just black paint on cement. I can do a dolphin kick. Or could. I grew up with a swimming pool my backyard, so I can do all those things … backstroke, butterfly, sidestroke, etc. Or could. Maybe I still could. I hope you enjoyed the swim, that sounds so … engulfing. ** Oscar 🌀, Haha, that was an especially beautiful riposte, sir. Oh, btw, some dead relative of yours found my email address on death’s internet and asked me to forward this selfie to you. Obviously chuffed that you dug those textiles a la moi. ‘Mystery Flesh Pit National Park’ … no, I don’t know it. Ooh, it sounds intriguing. Hunt it, I will. Possibly even post-haste. It’s probably too late now, but maybe either enter the PhD office wearing zombie makeup and walking very stiffly or, the easy method, walk speedily, keep glancing at your phone and saying, ‘God, I’m so late’? Or just go ahead and celebrate. I’m sure you deserve it. ** Right. Today I am allowing you, if you so choose, to spend the local part of your day with the guy who a whole of lot people think is the worst film director who ever lived. Want to find out if they’re right? See you tomorrow.

« Older posts Newer posts »

© 2025 DC's

Theme by Anders NorénUp ↑