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The blog of author Dennis Cooper

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Mark Doten presents … NOT MOUNTAIN GOATS DAY; OR: … *

*(Restored)

… SONGS THAT PRAISE THE MAN WITH THE GOAT’S HEAD IN ORDER TO CURRY FAVOR WITH HIM: Bandmates, Ephemera, Fellow Travelers, Side Projects and Blood Sacrifice, Plus NEW Interviews with JOHN DARNIELLE and FRANKLIN BRUNO, BONAFIDE STARS of INDEPENDENT ROCK ‘N’ ROLL

 


[image via]

 

PAGE FROM JOHN DARNIELLE’S EPISTOLARY-NOVEL-IN-THE-FORM-OF-A-CONTINUUM 33 1/3-BOOK, MASTER OF REALITY

about the Black Sabbath album of the same name, narrated by a kid you will feel a deep affection for if you care about tMGs song “The Best Ever Death Metal Band in Denton.”

 

 

One of the guiding principles of this day is: no posting videos of tMGs playing tMGs songs. After all, DC’s already hosted an excellent general interest tMGs day last September, “Thomas Moronic presents … “I’m coming home to you with my own blood in my mouth”: A celebration of the music of The Mountain Goats” and you can also check out a great post by Alec Niedenthal (w/an assist from Justin Taylor, sometimes known hereabouts as Maximum Etc.) over at HTMLGIANT. This day is instead a chance to gather together some things that are not songs by John Darnielle, tMGs fan videos, and educate myself about some people who are (or have been) members/ associates of tMGs. For that last category, I ended up focusing on Franklin Bruno, John Vanderslice and Peter Hughes (sorry, Jon Wurster, etc!). Most info here is cobbled together from the Internet – so please correct, expand, add favorite albums and so on in the comments. Also: I had half-wanted to lob a couple questions at JV and PH, to balance out the short interviews with JD and FB, but I figured I’d hassled enough people already. That said, John and Peter, if either of you see this, can I tempt you with the “early anecdote” question, applied to anyone else herein profiled?

So: you will find here absolutely no links to tMGs songs; however, as there is an entire tMGs subliterature comprised of JD’s onstage patter; and since the patter in the two versions of “The Best Ever Death Metal Band in Denton” embedded below are so closely related to the 33 1/3 book, I include them here, on the condition that no one watch the second past the 00:46 mark, which is when the song proper begins. I am serious. You can search for it yourself on Youtube if you want to hear the rest.

 

 

There’s another great piece of stage banter which I swear I had on a bootleg somewhere but now can’t find: anyhow, it goes something like this: Between songs, JD says how Chuck D of Public Enemy would ask live crowds, “Who’s my motherfuckin DJ?” and the crowd would shout back, “TERMINATOR X!” Then, JD asked his own crowd, “Who’s my motherfuckin producer?” and a few people in the crowd shouted “JOHN VANDERSLICE.” Which built into an epic call and response: “WHO’S MY MOTHERFUCKIN PRODUCER?” “JOHN VANDERSLICE.” “WHO’S MY MOTHERFUCKIN PRODUCER?” “JOHN VANDERSLICE.” “WHO’S MY MOTHERFUCKIN PRODUCER?” “JOHN VANDERSLICE.”

 

JOHN VANDERSLICE


[Photo credit: Autumn de Wilde]

 

JV’s website, his his tumblr, his twitter.

JV was born in 1967 in Gainsville, FL. In the 90s his band was MK Ultra. You can download MP3s of all three MK Ultra albums for free on their website. Maybe start with the song “Catastrophe Practice” from 1996’s Original Motion Picture Soundtrack, or “I Miss the War” ] from 1999’s The Dream is Over. Since then, he’s released six solo albums, most recently Romanian Names, which includes the song “Fetal Horses,” which is just so great:

 

 

Here’s the recording studio he founded in 1997, Tiny Telephone. Lots of cool people have recorded there. I found the studio’s FAQ page pretty interesting, as someone who’s never set foot in one – It’s $350 a day (sounds reasonable, right?) plus $200 for a “first engineer” (a “second engineer” is half that). Also, have you thought about the tape you are using, and who will deliver it? Well and are you using the piano? If so, you should check out FAQ number 6:

6. Who is responsible for piano tuning?
The client is solely responsible for piano tuning. It’s frequently moved and treated, both of which knock the C3 out of tune. We’ll gladly have you in a few days before your session to check the tuning. If the piano is central to your project, we strongly encourage you to book the tuner for the day of your session. He has keys, so he can start well before you load in. Try to book him in advance.
Piano tuner: Israel Stein, 510 558 0777 (he’s around $100)

 

 

The big board is a Neve 5316. As it happens, Tiny Telephone is the top result if you Google “neve 5316.” (The second is “gearslutz.com”, and the consensus there is that this a damn good board!)

JV’s tumblr is very active. A recent post showed a photo of jars and bottles of: black bean garlic sauce, spiced vinegar, chili paste with garlic, chile oil, garlic chili sauce, and two other bottles, one dark, one light. “All this for $13. Manila Market, I love you.”

A PIECE OF SEMI-PALINDROMIC JD PROSE FROM THE LINER NOTES TO ALL HAIL WEST TEXAS, PLUS JD’S MUSINGS ON THE PANASONIC RX-FT500

 

 

FRANKLIN BRUNO


[photo credit: Michael Cargill]

 

FB was born in Upland, Califronia in 1968. He has been recording in various capacities since the early 90s. This paragraph, copied from The Human Hearts MySpace page, sums things about a few things. “The Human Hearts is a flexible branding medium for the realization and dissemination of songs (and other musical work, but let’s face it, it’s gonna mostly be songs) by Franklin Bruno, also known as 1/3 of the Southern California power trio Nothing Painted Blue, 1/2 of The Extra Glenns, and as a solo artist in his own right.” To round that out, FB also played keyboards on tMGs albums Talahassee and The Sunset Tree, writes poetry, and is sort of notorious for a review he did in the 90s of a terrible novel about indie rock. It is the FUNNIEST FUCKING THING EVER and was actually my first exposure to FB – I think it was my friend Gabby who showed it to me when I was an undergrad, and it was a couple years later before my friend Steve gave me the FB solo album, A Bedroom Community.

Most recently, FB released Local Currency (Fayettenam Records), a CD of early solo singles and compilation tracks. And he and JD have recorded a followup to Martial Arts Weekend, the first and so far only Extra Glenns album. For those who haven’t heard that one, it’s a collaboration between FB and JD, and sounds – surprise! – like a hybrid between John and Franklin’s sounds, which is a very happy space to inhabit. They will release the new album under the moniker The Extra Lens, for reasons which were not made clear to me but are probably mysterious and interesting and none of my business.

Here are three FB things you should listen to:

Pilot Light by The Human Hearts.

The Nothing Painted Blue track (or “N∅thing Painted Blue” (or “∅PB”) “Another Child Bride”:

 

 

And an amazing live version of an unreleased solo FB song with characteristic nerdy banter about Leonard Cohen and Locke’s Second Treatise of Civil Government:

 

 

And a live Extra Glenns track:

 

 

FB has an infrequently updated blog; in one of the more recent posts, he discusses the whole thing of releasing under your own name versus a band name:

Nothing against those who do, but I think that I have not cared to use a bandonym for much the same reason that, as a show-goer and -performer in L.A., I dressed in a staid manner that I’d call “neutral” except that it of course revealed some sort of affiliation to my class-fragment. To spell it out: If you disdain me before you know anything about me because I’m not bearing the mark of cool, it is as well that I don’t know you, and that you don’t know my music. If you can’t figure out that an individual who records pseudonymously may be implicated in all manner of objectionable (or not) Romantic self-expression, and that one who does not may not admit of any direct equivalence between the “I” of songs and the person who happens to be performing them, then, again, it is well that, etc. Also, good luck with fiction and poetry.

Should one at this point exclaim “but the self is fragmented/decentered/illusory,” I reply: Perhaps, but if so, then this is the case whether or not I fuck about with self-presentation. “Franklin Bruno” may well be held together with spittle and memories, but this is so, and is reflected (or not) in the work, quite independently of whether or not he goes to the trouble of rebranding himself Ziggy McPersona.

 

QUESTIONS FOR FRANKLIN BRUNO

MD: It must be weird to listen to/think about the Local Currency songs as a group. Are there any of these songs you hadn’t listened to since they were first released — or, maybe I should say instead: which song had it been the longest on? Which was the most surprising? (That is, unless you go home most nights, uncork a bottle of Chilean wine and play your old singles and compilation tracks. There’s a joke on the Home Movies season 4 commentary track where the other voice actors repeatedly insist that since it was cancelled, the show’s creator, Brendan Small, has kept the DVDs of the show on perpetual loop in his house. I have to imagine there are a few indie rock guys who more or less live that.)

FB: Well, among Inland Empire bands, it’s Wckr Spgt who are most noted for listening to their own stuff incessantly (like, at breaks from practices). Me, not so much, which is also related to being a poor archivist. I think the songs that had faded from memory were mostly those on the odd one-off compilations that were a staple of indiedom during the ’90s — you recorded something-or-other, sent it off on a cassette or (if you were fancy) DAT, received some copies many months later (except in a few cases where the label just flaked or ceased to exist), with or without the return of your master. These tended to be songs that I wouldn’t be likely to play live for one reason or another, with the result that it would be a real feat for to remember how just a couple of these songs go (especially the ones in open tunings, like “Rice King.”) Perhaps no great loss.

All that said, it wasn’t all that strange to listen to the Local Currency material as a group, as many of the songs were written in a short span of time (though some weren’t released until quite a bit later), and some of them, the first three 7″s especially, always felt like an album-in-disguise with some, ahem, “themes” (the shared character of money and language, love triangles, martyrdom, the material limitations of the four-track method). I was pleasantly surprised in a couple cases that I’d taken trouble to come up with and execute fairly interesting guitar parts, and taken aback that I hadn’t bothered to sing the damn song effectively. But, again, that was the ’90s.

MD: I asked JD the same question about you: Please relate one mid-length, or two very short, anecdote(s), possibly humorous, from the earliest days of your acquaintance with John Darnielle.

FB: (1) Very first thing John and I ever tried to work on, before there were any Mtn. Goats or Extra Glenns/Lens recordings extant, was his idea of setting the Vachel Lindsay poem “Factory Windows are Always Broken” to music. I actually did this, but ended up playing it in Nothing Painted Blue instead of w/ John, for no reason I can remember. It’s never been recorded, and wasn’t so hot anyway — basically a “Sweet Jane” chords. But still a good idea. (2) Though I’m glad that John appreciates my aliveness to the Goat Head (but wasn’t it “Evil Goat Head”?), and while I’ve sometimes suspect that whatever worldly success or cultural currency our efforts have attained may ultimately result from our obeisance to said demiurge, I’m surprised that he has failed to bring to light another early, unrealized project: “Obnar,” our improvised sound-poetry opera in the manner of Kurt Schwitters “Ur-Sonate.”

 

THE YOUNG THOUSANDS: SOME MOUNTAIN GOATS FAN COVERS

 

PETER HUGHES

[photo credit: John Vanderslice.]

 

Peter Hughes has been playing bass with the Mountain Goats live on and off since 1995, and has been on all the albums since 2001, when JD switched from recording mostly on boombox to recording with a full band instudio. The first times I saw them, TMGs toured as a two piece with PH and JD, which works really well since JD’s guitar playing is so percussive that you don’t necessarily need a drummer (though they’ve got a very good one now in Jon Wurster). PH also played in Nothing Painted Blue.

 

 

PH will release a solo album this year called Fangio. Per his website: “Fangio–the album-length sequel to a song I wrote for my Casio-powered solo project, Party of One, in 1987, a song that imagined five-time Formula 1 World Champion and Argentine folk hero Juan Manuel Fangio piloting a Saab 900 Turbo SPG across the Andes mountains on a covert mission to assassinate Chilean dictator Augusto Pinochet–currently sits in pit lane, crew scurrying about, final preparations being made before advancing to the starting grid.”

 

 

DiscothiQ (pronounced “dis GOTH uh cue” – the name comes from how an American might pronounce “discotheque” if they didn’t know better) was PH’s 90s band. Again, per PH’s website “DISKOTHI-Q (hyphenated when all caps, nonhyphenated with cap Q when uppers-and-lowers dontcha know) is Peter Hughes, Kevin Hughes, Kevin Trapp, and, at times, Rob Garlt. We haven’t done anything since Trapp and I moved away from the Empire in 2000, but from 1991 up til then we kinda did a lot.”

There are a whole lot of free DiscothiQ mp3s on PH’s website. Maybe start with “Pomp & Circumstance” from 1996’s Waterworld? Though you should also check out this other kind of insane project, where the band recorded a song for each of the 32 NFL teams. This has to my mind a number of advantages over Sufjan Stevens 50 State Project, for instance the fact that 32 songs rather 50 lps means that one’s children and one’s children’s children would not be forced to continue toiling on the project long after one’s own death. Per PH’s website: “No longer trying to be anything other than the semi-competent indie-rock band we in fact were, we turned our ambitions to more worthy endeavors. Namely, 32 songs about 32 teams. Yes, we really fucking did this. Realignment and free agency have rendered these works largely obsolete and irrelevant, but the immutable and outrageous genius of these CDs–the fact that we actually accepted the dare and made good on it–still shines as brilliantly as ever.”

Here’s a YouYube video tribute to the Bengal wide receiver Chris Henry backed by Discothiq’s “Bengals.” (I recommend starting this one at 1:41 and stopping it at 3:40, for reasons that will become obvious if you fail to follow these very simple instructions.)

 

 

There’s a fascinating long interview with PH from 2007 on the Merlin Show in which he talks, among other things, about how different it was to tour before the invention of cell phones, and how kids these days, they just don’t have the first clue:

“The way we did it in 1993 was if you needed to advance for the club, or you needed to get directions or you needed to call your girlfriend you had to find a payphone. You had to get a calling card, pull off… Gawd, when I think of what we had to go through…. being in the middle of B. F. Ohio, and being late, so you have to call the club. You have to find a town with a gas station or some place that’s going to have a pay phone. You get off at some random exit. I remember driving for like 20 minutes just looking for a freaking pay phone. So now you’re making yourself later and you’re crossing your fingers that there’s even going to be someone on the other end that you can tell…. it sucked.”

He also talks in the interview about how to build a career in music, and speaks extensively about his LiveJournal, which he uses as a tour diary and for interacting with fans. (You have to start your own LiveJournal and friend him to see his posts since 2005, cos anonymous people on the Internet are dicks who ruin everything.)

And, lastly: PH interviewed in 2009 for the Loyola Phoenix, where he gets a little nerdy about Stephen Colbert:

Q: The band played on the Colbert Report last week and Stephen Colbert, in a rare moment of sincerity, confessed he was a huge fan. What was that like?

PH: When someone who is a part of your life, a part of your universe in a way that Stephen Colbert has been a part of mine — and your’s too, I’m sure — and all of a sudden you discover you’re equally part of his universe … it’s such a mind-blowing thing. It was a surreal day.

 

A RECENT POST FROM LAST PLANE TO JAKARTA, JD’S INTERNET HOME, WHICH IS WORTH EXPLORING FOR ANY NUMBER OF REASONS, FOR INSTANCE IF YOU NEED LISTENING SUGGESTIONS, OR IF YOU NEED OCCASIONAL LIFE-COACHING, BOTH OF WHICH ARE ON DISPLAY BELOW

note all qualifiers

if you’re going to sing
in the screaming punk style
which took hold
sometime toward the end of the eighties

then the way to do it
is in the way one hears
on the new album
by noted Krishnacore act 108

with passion that seems to actually spring
from somewhere
screaming like you feel a need to scream
not like it’s a formal constaint

if you’re going to sing
in that screaming style
which is now so common
that it almost never sounds angry

or desperate
or rebellious
or sincere
or interesting

or anything but profoundly conformist, really
then do it like that guy from 108
if you’re going to do the scream-sing thing
repeat: if you are

 

QUESTIONS FOR JOHN DARNIELLE

MD: A number of authors get name-checked in your songs, from Cicero to Sax Rohmer. What writers have influenced you that maybe don’t have a song yet?

JD: Quite a few, but I am weirdly private about my reading list – I like being the only person who knows the exact combination of poetry & prose that makes me write the way I do, since I do think that pretty much any writer is the sum total of what he’s read, plus the tiny spark of self that he brings to the process. You can’t discount that spark, and without it there’s nothing, but the main thing is the reading list, and it’s as personal & important as the “this is the tiny new bit that I brought to the table” part. Having said that, I quoted Norman Dubie on the sleeve of the Nine Black Poppies EP, but I haven’t really given him a song, but I think reading him when he was kind of the hot name for a while there – around the time of Groom Falconer and the Springhouse and Radio Sky – had a pretty big impact on me.

MD: How do you think influence works between genres — maybe a specific instance or two from your work?

JD: Well – I steal images from film all the time; for me, that’s the primary function of film: to provide visual images for me to play with. “Oceanographer’s Choice” is the sort of obvious one, where the characters in the song are watching a giallo on television and describing it in the song’s first couple of lines as though the action on the screen were happening outside in the room. I mean, really, this is going to sound like some rainbow-prism-eyed stuff to say, but I think genre is at least 1/2 marketing conceit. It’s a useful concept for enthusiasts of a form, you know, for the pleasures of taxonomy – is this really a horror movie, or is it just a particularly grisly mystery? is this a comic novel, or are its comic aspects a formal gesture to make its uglier parts seem even uglier by contrast? – but I always feel like it should be emphasised: that sort of question-posing is kind of the critical equivalent of sudoku. I like to play sudoku, too, but in the end it has very little to do with, you know, the glories of higher mathematics, and I think for me in the final analysis genre, the whole concept, is a toy. Fun toy if you want it! Useful tool for making delineations between things. But in the end, I don’t believe in genres as anything more than that — songs, movies, books, photographs – these are all forms of the same impulse: the narrative or performative impulse.

MD: What are your favorite songs about books?

JD: None come to mind – my brain immediately starts thinking up songs with “book” in the chorus, two of which involve Walter Becker (“Green Book” and “Book of Liars,” the latter a favorite) and another that has a nonsensical but awesome chorus (“Black Book” by Stephen Malkmus). Why are books known for their colors in songs?

MD: People often speak of certain common technical mistakes in the work of young fiction writers — POV that doesn’t gel, overuse of adverbs in dialog tags, that sort of thing. Are there specific technical problems you see repeatedly in the work of beginning songwriters?

JD: Yeah there’s one, a pet one, which I’ll get to shortly, but the main thing is less technical than – well, for lack of a better term, “moral.” Not moral problems in the sense so much of “what you are doing is morally indefensible,” but more of a “the terms of the moral universe in which you are setting your song are lame, and since you’re the one setting those terms, this is a problem you should fix.” What the hell am I even talking about — this: young men (this problem really doesn’t seem to exist for young women who write songs) often like to present a narrator whose self-destructive “urges” (they usually aren’t real “urges” so much as cosmetic choices about how to present himself) are clearly placing him on a collision course with doom. The narrator of these songs often seems to hope that the important people in his life will be both very impressed by the special nature of his pain, and that some people who have spurned him will be so horrified by the things his pain has made him do that they will either a) give him what he wants from them or b) speak with awe about him.

Really can’t stand that kinda stuff. There is one thing special about your pain: it’s yours. That ought to be enough, in my opinion; you can describe it from there, and take control of it, detail it lovingly, etc. But when a narrator seems to think that he is somehow beatified by his own particular collection of neuroses, well, this bugs me. I was as guilty of this early on as anybody, and one of my most popular songs is pretty much One Of These Types, and it’s not that all songs like this are bad. In fact many of them are quite good. But it’s a tendency that should be outgrown quickly. Often there are two main characters in a song like this, and almost always, the song would be a much better one of the two weren’t acting like a child.

MD: I asked Franklin the same question about you: Please relate one mid-length, or two very short, anecdote(s), possibly humorous, from the earliest days of your acquaintance with Franklin Bruno.

JD: Because my memory is pretty unreliable I usually have to make stuff up for questions like this. 1. Once Franklin and I were at a performance of La Boheme at the Dorothy Chandler when an earthquake struck. “Earthquake?” quipped Franklin. “I hardly knew her!” 2. Ages and ages ago, before I knew Franklin, some friends and I used to make up songs & stories about the imminent takeover of the earth by the Dark Lord, who would appear as a well-dressed man with a goat’s head, seldom seen save from the corners of one’s eyes as he turns the corner just after some disaster strikes. (This was long before the days of the Mountain Goats.) One friend and I thought that the songs in praise of the infinite wisdom of Mr. Goat’s Head were about the funniest things in the world; we would drink coffee til dawn refining them. Our other friends were less taken with the process. They would leave the table if discussion of Mr. Goat’s Head started to heat up. However, one day, some years later, I told Franklin about the whole thing. He was the first person outside of the original Goat’s Head Circle to not only be amused by it, but to further contribute to the canon of Songs That Praise The Man With the Goat’s Head In Order to Curry Favor With Him. When Franklin laughed at goat’s head songs, I knew we were in for the long haul.
—-

*

p.s. Hey. I’m moving all of my stuff halfway across Paris into a new apartment today, but I offer you this revivified guest post by the awesome author Mark Doten. Enjoy, please. See you tomorrow.

‘tell me what you want and i will tell you if you’re crazy’: DC’s select international male escorts for the month of March 2017

_____________


Cashstudent, 20
Köln

Student of $ here, for $ fun, the more $ the less fun it has to be for me, with gentlemen.
I’m not a proffesional.
I’m not cultured and intelligent.
I’m not for everyone.
I am 100,000,000% bottom.
(_._) (_o_) (_O_)

Dicksize L, Uncut
Position More bottom
Kissing No entry
Fucking Bottom only
Oral Versatile
Dirty WS only
Fisting No
S&M Soft SM only
Client age Users between 36 and 99
Rate hour ask
Rate night ask

 

_____________



AirBednBoy, 22
Malate

I’m a sort of un usual full gay bottom escort some would say I like fucked and poppers and to please a good cock but behind the secret of me what no one knows yet is that I want something normal bottoms would not want and it is not to be fucked that is not what I want but if you want to know what that need is feel free to sent me a message and ask i will tell n pvt

Guestbook of AirBednBoy

Anonymous – March 9, 2017
Psssst, it involves chess pieces.

Dicksize No entry, Cut
Position More bottom
Kissing No entry
Fucking No entry
Oral No entry
Dirty No
Fisting No entry
S&M No
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour 100 Dollars
Rate night ask

 

_____________

hetero2blow, 19
Mexico City

I’m straight, but I love getting blown by men while I’m driving my car. Do you want to suck my cock while I drive around, humor free, then get something from your wallet?

Dicksize No entry, Cut
Position No entry
Kissing No entry
Fucking No entry
Oral No entry
Dirty No entry
Fisting No entry
S&M No entry
Client age Users between 18 and 70
Rate hour ask
Rate night ask

 

______________

Disputive, 19
Warsaw

You know who I am.
I offer my tight and virgin ass (I’ve always been top).
You can taste it too if you pay well.
It has been tasted before.
You can also buy my underwear.

Guestbook of Disputive

societygay – March 1, 2017
I recommend the underwear.

Dicksize No entry, Uncut
Position No entry
Kissing No entry
Fucking No entry
Oral No entry
Dirty No
Fisting No
S&M No
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour ask
Rate night ask

 

_____________



Lamb, 19
Katowice

I am witch.
I am 17 fucking years old.
I WILL MAKE YOU ADDICTED TO ME, I WILL WASHING YOUR BRAINS TOTALLY.
I do this at home. I do not want to meet anyone outside the house and I only do this in the house.
Do not confuse me with your lover, or with your husband or your boy friend, ,,,,,
I am not one of them.

Dicksize XL, Uncut
Position Versatile
Kissing Consent
Fucking Versatile
Oral Versatile
Dirty WS only
Fisting Active / passive
S&M Soft SM only
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour 30 Dollars
Rate night 75 Dollars

 

_____________


park, 22
Vienna

Let’s walk down to the park!

Finding my perfect partner wherever I go!

CLIENT IS A KING, KING NEVER BARGAIN!

I am a Arab, everyone has fantasies about Arabs!

Remember I don’t kiss!

Everyone love my arms, I don’t know why!

Please no yung guys!

Guestbook of park

Anonymous – Mar 2nd, 2017
your arms are beyond Godly !!!

Anonymous – Feb 27th, 2017
i had peerfect time with your superior arms and other parts

Anonymous – Feb 24th, 2017
beautiful arms, your arms where incredible! keep up good work xo

sam190 – Feb 11th, 2017
he allowed me to first lick and sniff his arms, then he showed me different vids of him fucking girls, then i fucked him!

Dicksize No entry, Cut
Position Bottom only
Kissing No entry
Fucking No entry
Oral No entry
Dirty No entry
Fisting No entry
S&M No entry
Client age Users between 50 and 65
Rate hour ask
Rate night ask

 

____________



Pregnant Twink, 23
Chattanooga

Male Pregnancy or Mpreg is a fantasy role-play fetish, fantasizing that men can be impregnated, carry a child or multiple to tern, and give birth. It involves one partner wearing a fake pregnant belly outfit and actively role-playing being pregnant in any situation (For the purposes of escorting, I fill this role, I’m naturally submissive) and the other partner being the one that knocked him up. The possibilities of what we can do for our hour or more together vary widely, and the belly does not get in the way of having sex or foreplay. If I’ve sparked your interest, or made you stop & think “why do I think this is so fucking hot” then you should hire me 🙂

Dicksize L, Cut
Position Versatile
Kissing Yes
Fucking More bottom
Oral Bottom
Dirty Yes
Fisting Active
S&M Yes
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour 100 Dollars
Rate night 500 Dollars

 

____________



STYLIN_PLAYER, 19
Barcelona

I MAKE A GOOD DESCONTRACTURING. THE ONLY PERSON WHO DOES THIS IN BARCELONA. I HAVE BEEN TESTED FROM SPAIN, CATALONIA, FRANCE, GERMANY, SWITZERLAND, AUSTRIA, AUSTRALIA, DENMARK, SWEDEN, ITALY, PORTUGAL, USA. ALSO MY ASS IS PRETTY LOOSE IF YOU WANT TO PENETRATE IT. ALSO I’M A GIANT (6’7″). ALSO I WANT TO HAVE FUN FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE.

Dicksize L, Cut
Position No entry
Kissing Consent
Fucking Bottom only
Oral Versatile
Dirty No entry
Fisting No entry
S&M No entry
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour 100 Euros
Rate night 400 Euros

 

_____________


Johnnie, 19
London

Well hello to you too!
Name’s Johnnie. Just as it says on my profile. Coincidence? Conspiracy? I shan’t tell you. Muahaha.

As you can see, my profile doesn’t have offers for free unicorns every appointment (though I do provide Phoenix’s hatchlings for only £24.99. Grab quick, they tend to set my pen ablaze a lot. Also, sounded like a sexual innuendo. Win-win?)

Instead, I’m relying on good ol’ charm to seduce you. And wit, so I don’t seem like a total twit. Rhyme, too, apparently. huh.

I don’t claim I can fondle you whilst juggling babies and dolphin-riding. Not saying I can’t, but babies aren’t for juggling.

If you’ve enjoyed what I’ve written so far, then huzzah! AND, if you also find the photos of me alluring, then hell, we are a match made in meeting and relationship heaven. (Get it? Hell and Heaven? Yin-Yang? I’ll stop.)

Sooo… See you soon?
Your *not-so* Secret Admirer,
Johnnie

Guestbook of Johnnie

Johnnie – March 4, 2017
Wow. I don’t remember ever feeling such a strong blush come over me as I do now, after reading your praise of me. I will try to restrain my giddiness and cordially say – Thank You. I hope to see more of you, Jack, and am tremendously happy I left you satisfied. Huzzah!

Jack – March 3, 2017
Johnnie doesn’t like to pretend that he is somebody else than himself. He is a cute, exuberant young boy with a hot ass who likes to party with people who don’t use their “feelings” during sex and to crack jokes while giving and taking a lot of sperm.

Dicksize L, Cut
Position Versatile
Kissing Yes
Fucking Versatile
Oral No entry
Dirty No entry
Fisting No entry
S&M Soft SM only
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour 200 Pounds
Rate night 1500 Pounds

 

______________


666SpecialCase666, 20
Rome

I’m looking for someone that’s generous with money and is seriously into praising Satan during evil, nasty minded sex OR someone who’ll pay to perv with me as we worship penis and butt for Satan. You must be able to verbally hail Satan as your lord and master. Do it.

SERIOUS WEALTHY SATANISTS ONLY – if you have no experience in praising our dark lord Satan, please do not hire.

IF YOU ARE VERY FAMOUS A CELEBRITY STATUS CONFIDENTIALITY AGREEMENT IS AVAILABLE.

Blasphemy is absolutely essential too.
Hail \m/

Guestbook of 666SpecialCase666

theBEAST – March 10, 2017
666SpecialCase666 now owned by its God the BEAST.
it is not allowed to talk with others.
I am it’s God.
it shall live in wanting.
God forces it prostrate under My booted feet:
God flays it’s soul.
Yea as it offers itself on My Alter of torment, it fears.
For I am before it.
My Rod and Staff bring torment to it.
God prepairest the table of agony, in excess of all of it’s limits.
Surely pain and torment will be inflicted on it all the days of it’s life.

AVE SATANIS

Dicksize XXL, Uncut
Position Versatile
Kissing Yes
Fucking Versatile
Oral Versatile
Dirty No entry
Fisting No entry
S&M Yes
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour 80 Euros
Rate night 400 Euros

 

_____________


Simon, 21
Köln

Hi sell only private porn videos of me and my friend

I *
21
185
85
18×5
* i am an TV actor, worked in many shows

My friend *
19
180
71
16X4
* he had sex with many actors, some very famous

The following films are offered:

7min movie + 9 min movie = 15 € just kissing
10 min Movie 10 € – kissing &pissing
23min Movie 20 € – Sex with cumshot
23 min Movie 20 € – more sex with cumshot
27 min Movie 25 € – Sex with fuck &cumshot

All films together = 60 €

Guestbook of Simon

BOY20 – Feb 27, 2017
Willing to pay to smell your fart

Dicksize L, Cut
Position No entry
Kissing Yes
Fucking Versatile
Oral Versatile
Dirty No entry
Fisting No entry
S&M No entry
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour ask
Rate night ask

 

______________



mmmmmyummmm, 21
Brooklyn

I. gotta. famous. anus.

Mixing. it. with. business.

Dicksize M, Cut
Position More bottom
Kissing Yes
Fucking Versatile
Oral Versatile
Dirty No
Fisting No
S&M No
Fetish Leather, Jeans, Drag
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour 100 Dollars
Rate night 800 Dollars

 

______________




born_slippy, 19
Paderborn

I love prostituting as an escape for everything nonsexual in my head. My normal life is so conservative but the sex I’m into is so hot that I know I’d never get it if there weren’t horny, twink-craving guys like you.

If I could be naked all the time in real life I would be. I love being naked. I’m well hung with a cute ass and hopefully you’ll enjoy having me remain naked in your company too.

I love being craved and driving horny men bonkers. If we are going to do this you’ll need an ‘I don’t care, I just want young flesh’ kind of attitude. It doesn’t work for me when guys are being polite. If you are, I’ll revert to being boring and conservative. It’s automatic.

I am very good at acting like I love whatever you do, very realistically. I like to moan, beg, praise your technique, do that ‘no, no, yes, yes’ talk in a high, girl voice because it puts me in a role away from being my boring self.

Just remember I am straight laced and I need to leave our date the way the way I came in so don’t give me hickeys if you can help it.

Dicksize L, Uncut
Position More bottom
Kissing No
Fucking Bottom only
Oral Top
Dirty No
Fisting No
S&M No
Client age Users between 18 and 48
Rate hour ask
Rate night ask

 

______________


HOTlegs, 18
Pohjois-Karjala

I am teen slut.
I’m like a girl in bed. I wear sexy slutty outfits.
I prefer to don’t use dick in sex at all.
I prefer to be treaten like a girl.
I only fuck with handsome guys.
When I say handsome, it means handsome.
I’m also pretty proudly an intellectual.

Dicksize No entry, Uncut
Position Bottom only
Kissing No entry
Fucking Bottom only
Oral Top
Dirty No entry
Fisting No entry
S&M No entry
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour ask
Rate night ask

 

______________



MrMoon, 20
Berlin

even though i dont sexually enjoy old men i crave them for some reason.
i like an old man with a lot of plans. if no plans i am hung, i like to fuck your mouth. hopefully also piss.

ummm i have castration fantasies, not immediately but soon, a month possibly, plus i want big bucks to be translated, but only when my butt is finally pregnant.
pointing that out may seem strange, but i do not think it’s disgusting. i’m not here for a psychiatric appointment.

tell me what you want and i will tell you if you’re crazy.
nothing thats going to get me thrown in jail.

Guestbook of MrMoon

BenutzMichMal – March 4, 2017
Ohhh, what I read here??


hopefully also piss

Hopefully also piss??? Oh yea! I Need your Piss 🙂 – on my boddy, in my face, in my mouth 🙂

Please come to Hamburg!!!!

fukiboysss – Feb 27, 2017
You are caind just one thing you wll bi a engel ????????????

Dicksize L, Uncut
Position Versatile
Kissing Consent
Fucking More bottom
Oral Versatile
Dirty WS only
Fisting No
S&M No entry
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour 120 Euros
Rate night 500 Euros

 

_____________

KeepItBalanced, 22
Vienna

Hey guys. I am Student and I need money so I have decided to fuck guys!

I’m just looking for short fucks at your place or potentially in a car.

I’m new to this, so forgive me if I don’t know how to work certain of my features.

Guestbook of KeepIt Balanced

kwqyn – March 11, 2017
Dont hire this guy
Don’t know what he is doing
Fake pictures
Fat and ugly
Don’t shower

Dicksize L, Uncut
Position Top only
Kissing Yes
Fucking Top only
Oral Versatile
Dirty WS only
Fisting Active
S&M Yes
Client age Users between 18 and 35
Rate hour 50 Euros
Rate night 100 Euros

 

_____________



BohemianFawn, 24
Abu Dhabi

No agenda.

I like sex where afterwards I think “Oh my God, what have I done?”

wrong:
hi fuck?
=> you WONT get an answer

good:
hi i want to book you from .. .. till .. .. how much is it?

Best if you start the night on your knees and crawl over to me. I want all the people make crazy with my nice body and face.

Write me. I have a car, so I can come everyway.

My business is my pleasure.

It’s my density!

Guestbook of BohemianFawn

BohemianFawn – March 5, 2017
*destiny not density

Dicksize XL, Cut
Position Versatile
Kissing Consent
Fucking More top
Oral Versatile
Dirty WS only
Fisting No entry
S&M Soft SM only
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour 250 Dollars
Rate night 800 Dollars

 

_____________



broke&elite4richpig, 20
Paris

Bonsoir. If we’ve met before there is a good chance we don’t keep in touch for a reason.

I’m looking for something more permanent. Tired of short time fucks and people just experimenting with boys one fourth their age.

You would need to show me how. Seriousness has always interested me but I’ve only been a fuck toy so I’m not sure where to start.

Guestbook of broke&elite4richpig

broke&elite4richpig – March 1, 2017
Warmer.

vidmuk27 – March 1, 2017
ok you wur born a girl but you idintifie as a boy

broke&elite4richpig – March 1, 2017
Nope.

vidmuk27 – March 1, 2017
yeh you are

broke&elite4richpig – March 1, 2017
No, I’m not.

vidmuk27 – March 1, 2017
your a girl

Dicksize No entry, Uncut
Position Bottom only
Kissing Consent
Fucking Bottom only
Oral Versatile
Dirty No
Fisting No
S&M Soft SM only
Client age Users between 29 and 55
Rate hour 100 Euros
Rate night 800 Euros

 

_____________



LordAlucard, 21
Antwerp

I am Lord Alucard, I serve on behalf of the Hellsing Organization under Sir Integra Fairbrook. I am 500+ yrs old and the last couple of clients who tried to stiff me wound up dead. One day I shall have my freedom and then nobody will be able to stop me from ruling the night. I’m a Fuck Mothering Vampire Whore and I have fucked a lot of people to get that title I deserve to be called such, so if you wish to hire me then please proceed and if not you have PISSED ME THE FUCK OFF, thank you and have a very unpleasant day. :[ HAHAHAHAHAHA #bitchslovecannons #fuckmotheringvampire #yourgoingtodie #longlivetheking #twilightsuckundeadcock #thecrimsonfucker

Dicksize M, Cut
Position Top only
Kissing Consent
Fucking Top only
Oral Top
Dirty No
Fisting Active
S&M Yes
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour 100 Euros
Rate night ask

 

_____________



JeunePetiteMerde, 19
Villefranche-sur-Saône

Young novice American transplant teen looks to try to make me a little penny to side. I’m not taken of my head, I jack off ten times a day. I do not know what to do, and I do not know what to do with it.

I try to become more than a boyfriend for other real males, but to be instead the garage to cock, even if that has to be by any way (even if I am against).

Whether it is for daddies, mature men, grandpa, bears, chubbies, other weirdos, or even guys severe, violent, without scruples. I want everyone to cum in my mouth. I want it filmed and I want a copy.

I have a very difficult character, rebel, angry, hate everything, thus not simple to manage. Men will need to have a gun or knife and flash it (if that does not frighten you).

I only play with big cocks so don’t contact me if you are below 16cm. In the evening I can receive in the cellar of my building if you are interested in that kind of trip.

Dicksize No entry, Uncut
Position Bottom only
Kissing Consent
Fucking Bottom only
Oral Versatile
Dirty Yes
Fisting Passive
S&M Passive
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour ask
Rate night ask

 

_____________


DerBottom, 19
London

SELLING ***EXACTLY*** THE FOLLOWING (IN LONDON):

Anything To Do With Compressed Air Being Pumped Into Me Anally.

I’m at least 97% sane.

PLEASE MAKE SURE YOUR CREDIT CARDS ARE REASONABLY UP TO DATE.

Guestbook of DerBottom

Anonymous – March 4, 2017
U masculine bro?

Dicksize L, Uncut
Position No entry
Kissing Consent
Fucking No
Oral No
Dirty No
Fisting No
S&M No
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour 150 Pounds
Rate night 500 Pounds

 

______________

MAN-VERYSTRONG, 23
London

MAN VERY VERY STRONG. FOR ONE. WEEK IN LONDON.

So guess what… I need cash…. And I’m gay. So I know what I’m talking about.

Better looking and more chilled in person!

A little promiscuous but aye ?

Guestbook of MAN-VERYSTRONG

Anonymous – Feb 21, 2017
MAN-VERYSTRONG neglects to mention that she’s a bent wristed, gay faggot swish the likes of which I haven’t seen since the 1960s, so I’ll mention it.

Dicksize XL, Uncut
Position Versatile
Kissing Yes
Fucking Versatile
Oral Versatile
Dirty WS only
Fisting Active
S&M Yes
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour 200 Pounds
Rate night 1000 Pounds

 

_____________



you’ve_seen_worse, 18
Phoenix

Hi I’m a Asian boy in Phoenix Arizona who has a big fetish and love for White men and always willing to give All White men My Body to use as there sexual pleasure. I Truly truly truly truly Love white Men. I would love to be able to someday find a Anglo man to have me as their voleenter Full time boyfriend. I’m currently always enjoy white men in the Phoenix area from ages 18 to 100+.

Guestbook of you’ve_seen_worse

rjaykim – March 3, 2017
You deserve the world, and he knows he can’t give that to you. So he gives you the next best thing: his ass.

Bearded-Lover – March 1, 2017
This boy would be very good for racists which I am not. In bed it felt like I was white meat on his plate and he was “yellow” meat on mine. Still he loves to suck a lot and take the sperm in his mouth and swallow mmm good times.

Loveyourass – Feb 28, 2017
MY REVIEW OF YOU’VE_SEEN_WORSE
Seems cute but he’s Asian so who knows

Seems to love the taste of cum in his mouth and the “taste” of cum in his ass

Seems his ass was mine to do whatever I wanted to it, eat it, fuck it, abuse it, hurt it, completely up to me

Doesn’t seem to care about age or looks (I’m ugly) as long as you’re white and give his ass a huge seeing too

Dicksize S, Cut
Position Bottom only
Kissing Yes
Fucking Bottom only
Oral Bottom
Dirty No
Fisting No entry
S&M Soft SM only
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour ask
Rate night ask

 

_____________


Nils, 23
Padova

It is important to me that we get along during the sex.

Dicksize M, Cut
Position Bottom only
Kissing No entry
Fucking No entry
Oral No entry
Dirty No entry
Fisting Passive
S&M Yes
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour ask
Rate night ask

 

______________

ForeshadowerOfTruth, 20
Baltimore

I write darker poetry to express my feelings as I don’t like expressing them any other way so don’t expect me to express them during sex because I can’t.

I also like psychology because people who want to fuck me are interesting in the way that they are mentally.

I like darker things because they are all that I have ever known. “Chasing behind you the masked men will find you to drain you of all your colors.”

I won’t have sex with Nationalists, boring people, bigots, hunters, bullies, people who eat meat, people who use Windows Phone, people into subsitence farming, Bono, Chad Kroeger, and people who get super annoyed when you use your mobile at the theater.

Please no one older than 24 talk to me.

Dicksize L, Uncut
Position Versatile
Kissing Yes
Fucking More top
Oral Versatile
Dirty No entry
Fisting No entry
S&M Soft SM only
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour 80 Dollars
Rate night 350 Dollars

 

______________


Loverboy, 18
Linz

i am shy, passive, smiley, a type, considered stunning. willing to do anything as what satisfies you, even talking together afterwards which is not my favorite thing at all.

Dicksize M, Cut
Position Versatile
Kissing Consent
Fucking No entry
Oral Versatile
Dirty WS only
Fisting Active / passive
S&M Soft SM only
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour 1000 Dollars
Rate night 1500 Dollars

 

_____________



YoungDutchStudent, 21
Antwerp

Hi,

I am a student in the Netherlands and i have to go to the university of Antwerpen to write a part of my thesis.

I will be in Antwerpen from friday 3 march until wednesday 8 march.

However i am still looking for a place 2 stay during my research in Antwerpen.

Therefore i am looking for a man or men in Antwerpen that can host me from vrijday 3 march until wednesday 8 march. In return i will be serving as your sex toy! I can’t afford the hotels and i don’t like student hostels with big sleeping dorms.

So my body in return for a place to sleep. You only must respect the fact that i’ll have to study, which means i cannot he fucked 24h. I’ll have to study from 10.00 until 19.00, after that i am fuckable.

Dicksize XL, Uncut
Position Versatile
Kissing No entry
Fucking Versatile
Oral Versatile
Dirty No
Fisting Active / passive
S&M No entry
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour ask
Rate night ask

 

_____________

thenazzzzzz, 22
Zurich

I am a photographer.

I can photograph you in your evenings, days, vacations.

I CAN PUNCH YOU.

Other than that, I play piano.

Dicksize L, Uncut
Position Top only
Kissing No
Fucking Top only
Oral Top
Dirty Yes
Fisting Active
S&M Yes
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour 50 Euros
Rate night ask

 

_____________



organizerboy4u, 18
Rotterdam

I offer limited service with discounted price which are only Making Love or being FF.
18-year-old pretty Russian with a gentle sensitive skin, lots of fun for a man held.
I access from Rotterdam.
I found out cheeper access to various cities as day trip or overnight trip.

-Transport-
Amsterdam 14euro~ (Daily 2-3 trips. At least 3hours before contract confirming required)
Antwerp 15euro~ (Daily 4-5 trips. At least 4hours before contract confirming required)
Brussels 20euro~ (Daily 4 trips. At least 5hours contract confirming required)
Dusseldolf 30euro~ (Daily 1 trip. Overnight request & Contract confirming till 13:30 required)
Ghent 18euro~ (Daily 1 trip. one day before contract confirming required)
Lille 25Euro~ (Daily 4 trips. At least 5hours before contract confirming required)
Copenhagen 78Euro~
(THU,FRI,SAT,SUN,MON.Few hours or overnight requests.one day before contract confirming required)
Paris 50Euro~
(Daily 1-3 trips.Few hours or overnight requests.one day before contract confirming required)

-CASH-
LEAVE EXACT AMOUNT ON TABLE WHICH I CAN LOOK.
SECURITY REASON,I DON’T COMMUNICATE ABOUT DONATION.

-BANK TRANSFER-
BOOKING WILL BE CONFIRMED WITH SCREEN SHOT OF BANK TRANSFER.
THERE’S POSSIBILITY MEETING POSTPONE IF SCREEN SHOT DOESN’T PROVIDE
ACCOUNT 【JN HOSPITALITY ENTERTAINMENT】
IBAN   【NL55 KNAB 0255 3407 45】

— Rules —
Share life with me.
Don’t hire me if you don’t eat ass.

Dicksize No entry, Cut
Position Versatile
Kissing No entry
Fucking No entry
Oral No entry
Dirty No entry
Fisting Passive
S&M No entry
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour ask
Rate night ask

 

______________

2blovedbyu, 18
Nijmegen

I may allow some men the honor of renting Me soon. If you wish to rent Me you may message Me. If you want to message Me, do so on your knees. Message and beg Me to let you pay Me for allowing you this honour.

I’ve had some requests to anally penetrate me. Yes is the answer so I don’t have to keep replying.

I dont like the angry sad and jealous people.

It seems a lot of losers want to eat their dinner from the floor after I’ve walked all over it in my shoes, then lick the remains from my shoe soles. Yes that is something I do.

I AM ALSO IN TO BOYFRIEND Experience or something like that, I don’t know.

Dicksize M, Cut
Position More bottom
Kissing Yes
Fucking More bottom
Oral Bottom
Dirty WS only
Fisting No
S&M Yes
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour 150 Euros
Rate night 500 Euros

 

______________




DirtyBirdy, 19
Basel

Hi.. Young sleazy bug chasing boy looking for raw bareback sexdates! It never, ever stops, no matter how full to bursting point my sloppy cunt is with night after night of anonymous raw juice. I LOVE smelling a bare cock after it has seeded my eager hole, catching the leftover drips with my tongue and licking the taste of my inner ass off it. I have chems – you can use my chems for free.

I may be NASTY but i’m NICE. I’m very proud of doing this work and my career evolution until now. It’s not that I can speak about a career in the real sense of the word, like professionals do, but I think I still have plenty of time for that. I’m young and right now I earn enough doing this to live decently.

BUT PLEASE – IM NOT INTO BISEXUAL GUYS. RESPECT THAT!

Guestbook of DirtyBirdy

DirtyBirdy – Feb 10, 2017
where is my Dad?

DirtyBirdy – Jan 17, 2017
I’m back sorry I was gone. I got very sick. Unfortunately I cannot do outcall at this time. Locked down in my own bed at the moment. But nothing is forever.

WolkenRose – Jul 3rd, 2016
I could say here may worlds but the most important is that such long time Im waiting to find somebody that make fell free without prejudice and see that our sexuell life dosent to have be exactly whats is write in the books or just repeat what this bunch of sex Filmes in this moment try to make influence and what should made or done, sex dosent rolle if Boths parts are able just to get this moment and be happy with the present that God just send to us in this moment, and that was, DirtyBirdy was a gift from God to my self and I have an amazing time fulling him of my seeds, I thank you very much for that. Advice didnt think twice when you stuck it in his hole, close your eyes and just dump.

Dicksize XL, Uncut
Position More bottom
Kissing Yes
Fucking More bottom
Oral Versatile
Dirty Yes
Fisting Active / passive
S&M Yes
Fetish Leather, Sneakers & Socks
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour 100 Euros
Rate night 300 Euros

 

______________

hey-hey-hey-hey, 20
Concord

House-boy for reduced room rent.

Any location.

Look at me.

More about me later.

I have to sign off for now.

Dicksize No entry, Cut
Position More top
Kissing Yes
Fucking Bottom only
Oral Bottom
Dirty No entry
Fisting No entry
S&M No
Fetish Leather
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour 200000 Dollars
Rate night ask

 

____________

Failure, 22
Goldsboro

Hopefully this would be the last time I open an account ..

Young fella here. Ideally I would find a full time sugar daddy from here who is charismatic , passionate , genuine and (of course) generous.

I am currently living with my divorced aunt right here in Goldsboro who owns a store of which I help to manage in her absence …My parents are deceased and the only family I have left is my aunt and an elder sister who is happily married.. That’s pretty much everything about me I don’t have a lot going on with my life.

Please Note: It is very important you know that I study people a lot and know what to expect so it’s better you do not message me if you have bad intentions …

I hereby do not give permission for anyone who becomes my sugar daddy to share me with his friends or whoever. If you do that, you better find a lawyer.

Dicksize No entry, Cut
Position No entry
Kissing No entry
Fucking No entry
Oral No entry
Dirty No entry
Fisting No entry
S&M No entry
Client age No restrictions
Rate hour ask
Rate night ask

 

*

p.s. Hey. ** Steevee, Hey. I envied your blizzard, unsurprisingly. How did you like the Serra film? I liked it a lot. I was surprised by how much I liked it. Cool coincidence on the post’s timing re: your reading. I don’t really care about Rohmer’s politics. ‘The Green Ray’ is one of my top favorite Rohmers. I quite like ‘The Lady and the Duke’. I guess I didn’t find looking for its behind-the-scenes politics interesting enough? ** David Ehrenstein, Hi, David. Great thoughts about Rohmer, thank you! I love ‘La Collectionneuse’. That film doesn’t get noted and discussed so much these days, but, yeah, it’s gorgeous. ** Dóra Grőber, Hi! Yeah, leaving this area or losing it as home base and walking realm is a lot of the problem for me. But stiff upper lip and and all of that. I’ll make my mind create persuasive vibes to ride along with your submission today just in case. Let me know what happens, and, of course, don’t let yourself become easily discouraged if the place is short-sighted. We created the character (Tim) wanting it/him to have a particular kind of gravity and presence and calmness and and an odd slyness and stuff. Like I said, we wrote it for a particular guy who can’t do it. The actor we’re considering doesn’t inherently have all of those qualities, so when we try him again, probably tomorrow, this time along with the guy playing the main character with whom Tim has a special bond in the film, the question is whether we can get him to find the qualities we want or whether we can alter Tim’s character slightly in a way that suits the actor and will work. With all of the other performers we’ve cast, they were just naturally like the characters we chose them for, and with them it’s just a matter of fine-tuning who they are already. Our goal was to find the whole cast that way, but, in Tim’s case, it looks like we will need to construct the character in a more artificial way, and that’s a problem. But we may have no choice. I know the name Jason Mraz, but I don’t think I’ve ever heard his stuff. I’ll go investigate. Was the show awesome? The preparations for the move started okay. It gets serious today. The fun part of yesterday was we went to this piñata store/factory where we’ll be having custom pinatas made for the film. One of the characters — Tim, in fact — collects pinatas, and that plays a important part in the film. We need about 6 custom-designed pinatas and then about 20 regular (but interesting) ones. So we started that process. That was cool. Have a most splendid day, and please let me know about its splendors or non-splendors. ** Jamie, Hi, Jamie. I’m good, a little crazed and stressed until the apartment move is over, but good. How great that you like Rohmer so much! He’s in my small group of very favorite directors, for sure. When John Waters picked ‘LCTG’ for his top ten films of 2016 and said it was ‘Rohmer-like’, you can imagine how my chest puffed up. ‘A Tale of Autumn’ is wonderful, yeah. My faves … are probably ‘The Green Ray’, ‘Claire’s Knee’, ‘Marquise of O’, ‘Pauline at the Beach’, and ‘Perceval le Galois’. Most Rohmer-ites I know don’t like ‘Perceval’, but I think it’s singular and amazing. Oh, right, I liked ‘Starship Troopers’. ‘Total Recall’, yeah. I think the problem for me is there’s this contingent of people/critics who think he’s a genius and a great artist with this mastery of semiotics and so on, and they talk about ‘Starship Troopers’, say, like it’s Godard or Tati or something, and I just absolutely do not buy it. Moving prep totally sucks, no surprise, but, you know, that’s just me being whiny. Over money, right, yeah, no contract (?!) although I work without contracts all the time too, but I’m happy to hear the tunnel’s end might be flooded with light. Fingers strangled. Other than packing, it was just film stuff and a fun trip to a piñata store (see: my walk to Dora). Today is a long film meeting and a ton of packing. Should be … not great. Have an awesome 24! Burnt but well-meant love, Dennis. ** Frank Jaffe, Hi, Frank! Yeah, Local Films has been awesome to work with so far. It’s cool, we’re happy. I don’t know the Bayonetta games, but I will correct that post-haste. I don’t know ‘My Life as a Zucchini’ either. Huh. Ditto. Later, gator. ** Bernard, Hi, B. Lovely thoughts on Rohmer and his surroundings. I do remember your ‘Robocop’ love. And your non-love of ‘Blade Runner’. Thank you so kindly about my stairs thing. Wow, cool. And for the response. I’m down. ** S., Fashion Week in the Marais is when it’s at one if its funnest. Pepe le Pew, ha ha, awesome. Man, the French really, really don’t like Pepe le Pew. Even my smart friends get angry and defensive when I mention him/it. Thanks, buddy boy! ** _Black_Acrylic, Hi, Ben. I would say either ‘The Green Ray’ or maybe ‘Claire’s Knee’ would be a good starter? ** Misanthrope, Hi. The second ‘LCTG’ scene is tough for the best of ears. Deliberately so. Although I do think people in other countries who watch the film with subtitles probably hve a better and clearer time with that scene. Thank you, George. ** Chris dankland, Hi, Chris! Oh, cool, I’m glad you watched and liked ‘Pauline’. Yeah, I like that film a lot. ‘Perceval’ is a big fave film of mine. It’s defnitely not perfect, and things about it don’t work so well, but it’s such an amazing thing, with the indoors/ constructed world and the slowness wth which it’s used, and I do highly recommend watching it. My living place tends to be a combo, kind of minimalist but pretty messy. My only writing right now is film script revision and stuff on the opera and TV series. I haven’t touched my part-finished novel in ages. I am beginning to feel like I really want to go back to it. I haven’t been so interested in finishing it in a long time. So that’s good. And your writing, sir? Love, me. ** Okay. Escorts, middle of the month, the usual driill. See you tomorrow.

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