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The Kokeromin Cat Musical Instrument Hand Puppet
It’s harder than it looks and it’s literally more interesting than it sounds. It actually takes a lot of skill and creativity to make good tunes and melodies just with your hand movements inside the puppet. The unique musical toy offers proper scales and 12 different types of tones and sounds, including drums!

 

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揺れる！猫田ジュニア（Ｊｒ)
ワンワンパピードットコム http://www.wanwan-puppy.com
可愛いネコが木馬に乗ってゆ～らゆら！歌を歌いながらのんびり揺れるよ！

 

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Furifuri Nyaundo Cat
Ever wondered what kind of music a cat plays if you shake it?! Well, with the Furifuri Nyaundo Cat you can find out! Available in three colors (white, black or blue), just shake these feline instruments to make cute sounds and create your own music.

 

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ウォーキートーキーモンキー（おちょくりモンキー）
モヤモヤさまぁ～ず2（2013年：駒込の回）で登場した言葉を”おうむ返­し”しながらバタバタ動き回る『愛嬌満点』の憎めない猿です 御鑑賞アリガトウ御座います！癒しになったとのコト、幸いです！­コヤツ（猿）は久し振りに100％満足できた買い物でした

 

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Moving Toy “YOCHI YOCHI KUMAMON”
Kumamon is a famous character which acts as a mascot for a Kumamoto prefecture Japan. Such characters in Japan are called “yuru-kyara”.

 

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かわいい！話す人の声や音をマネして楽しくおしゃべり元気にダン
「こえマネ わんちゃん」はこちらが話した言葉や音を覚えて、動きながらマネしてくれる、とっても­かわいい玩具です。ネコのミーちゃん、ペンギンのペンちゃん、犬のワンちゃん、パンダ­のリンちゃん、ハムスターのハムちゃんがいます。

 

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Robi Jr
This little fellow is more than just a toy. He’s a household friend who can speak, sing, move his arms and head. He talks to you using around 1,000 phrases and can even understand certain expressions. Call his name to get his attention. While he can only speak in Japanese, he offers fortune-telling, seasonal phrases, comments about the time of day, and more. His eyes flash in different colors so you can see his mood. With his infrared sensors he can also detect where you are and turn to face you when he speaks.

 

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イワシタナオキ
最近流行ってるらしいね？嫁にクリスマスプレゼントであげちゃいました♪

 

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Ghost Pet
Bouncing happy pet that laughs at your jokes and repeats what you’ve said. Great gift to take to business meetings or gift for the kids.

 

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Bandai SmartPet Robot Dog
All hail the next generation of Aibo, the SmartPet by Bandai, the robot dog pet for the iPhone or iPod user. Interact with your pet via the touchscreen and also get him to do things according to what he sees and hears thanks to the camera. And put another Smartpet nearby and they will use Bluetooth to interact and communicate.

 

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癒しロボット犬猫ＨＶ
私は動物が大～好きです(特に犬猫は),,,
しかし私の歴史の中に悲しい事を経験、
動物は家族の一員!!! 本当の愛情を思うと飼えない

 

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Hide and Seek clock-chan Happy (Pink)
Tell time clock-Chan “chatted” with. Delight in action appearing face, hands and feet when talking! Our watch and talk, like your friends time announcement function will tell the time in the word and at a set time to alarm wake me up, as well.

 

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Cat Grey LOL Rollover Laughing Plush Toy
The laugh out loud rolling, laughing pet! You can’t help but laugh along with the LOL Rollover Pet. It rolls around back and forth on the floor laughing hysterically.

 

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Electronic Butterfly in a Jar
There is absolutely no way you can look at a Electronic Butterfly in a Jar and not smile. It is like having a piece of magic nature on your desk that defies death.

 

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DJ Rap Mimicry Pet Talking Electronic Rabbit
If you talk to MC Mimicry, it will repeat your words back to you, but in a rap song! You can turn the music on and off. MC Mimicry is just waiting to snuggle with you and be your best friend so buy it now!

 

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Takara-Tomy Porale Singing Polar Bear
The oh-too-cute Porale is a great toy for kids that sings and hums eleven different well-known tunes, and even responds to being touched or patted on the shoulder. This sweet white polar bear comes in two colors, red or blue, with different scarves for each one. Just press the switch on his left paw to get him to start singing the songs!

 

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PakuPaku Chorus Cat Puppet Instrument
During the puppet with four buttons! Cute doremi? s authentic sounds played.”in the sound of an animal animal puppet doll in with four buttons! You can play the Notes 8 scales with a combination of buttons. Has animal sounds are all become her meowing the cat.

 

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Pekoppa Plant listens to your feelings
The Pekoppa from Sega Toys is an innovative new communication plant that can respond to your speech with physical reactions using an internal “bio metal” that moves and bends depending on the current put through it. Pekoppa uses an internal chip that detects patterns in human speech, and responds to you by bending the stem and moving the leaves. A deep “bow” by Pekoppa shows agreement with what you’re saying, so you can carry on a two-way conversation without missing a beat!

 

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Straining Dog
ハイセンスなコレクタブルアイテムが登場！誰もが見たことのある あの最中を丁寧にソフビにしてみました。なんとも言えない 絶妙な『あの』感じを究極の癒やしに。。

 

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おさわり探偵なめこ栽培キット　ダンシングスピぐるみ
なめこが踊る！スピーカーの登場です♪♪♪
スマートフォンやミュージックプレイヤーにつなぐと、なめこから音楽が流れ、
更に、お手々のスイッチを押せば、なんと！なめこがゆらゆら揺れて踊りだす！なんとも可愛いスピーカーぬいぐるみです。
使わない時は可愛いなめこのぬいぐるみなので、インテリア性も◎

 

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Otona no Kagaku Bird Organ
These diminutive music boxes were a cherished ornament in the drawing rooms of ladies in 18th century France and now can have a place in yours too. Simply scroll the punch card through the organ to coax a tune of chirping canaries through the pipes. Did we mention you get to construct it yourself?

 

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Happiness Owl
The irresistibly cute Happiness Owl responds to you when you speak with hoots, noises and dialogue. Perching on a tree branch that you can sit on a table or surface, this owl will be your new best friend to make long study sessions at your desk go faster and comfort you if you’re lonely. He blinks his eyes and moves his head, and even plays music to you. There are four types of owls. Get all the owls together to create a chorus!

 

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Tamiya Centipede Robot
The colors make the Tamiya Centipede Robot easy on the eye. Building it is also easy, so you will have it, well, while not exactly “up and running,” at least “down and slithering” in no time. See how it moves over various terrains (its antennae allow it to adjust to uneven surfaces) and contemplate how its living relatives evolved and function in nature. As realistic as a genuine mukade, but without the dangerous sting!

 

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Fridgeezoo Extreme
Japan’s most popular shut-the-fridge-door reminder toy is back with two new versions. Fridgeezoo Extreme comes in either a walrus design called Beast or a penguin called Reporter. Beast is voiced by former wrestler Bob Sapp, while Reporter features the vocals of veteran journalist Noriko Shoji. Not only do these funny toys look hilarious sitting in your refrigerator, they feature 27 different voice patterns, including some partly in English (courtesy of Bob Sapp’s Beast). Guaranteed to amuse (or annoy?!) family and friends, as well as genuinely encourage you to save electricity by closing the fridge door.

 

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Disney Stitch Humidifier
Your office might be dry and boring, but the area around your desk doesn’t have to be. Same goes for your child’s playroom and bedroom! The Stitch Humidifier uses your powered USB port or an AC adapter to pump moisture out through Stitch’s open mouth, making your area more comfortable and…obviously…cute.

 

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Peeing Dog
From the makers of the classic Choken Bako comes the Peeing Dog, a toy canine that totters along by itself…and, yes, pees! Put some water in and watch the pooch raise his leg and mark his territory! With three cute types to choose from, this is the latest wacky toy from Japan that should take the world by storm.

 

 

*

p.s. Hey. ** David, Hi. Ah, yes, I remember that scene from ‘Quadrophenia’. Very scenic yet treacherous. You guys have some seriously great cliffs over there. ** Dominik, Hi!!! Yes, we could get rich and, at least in Leo’s case, it wouldn’t make a dent on his end. Clearly us befriending some troubled billionaires is the solution for everyone concerned. Oh, yes, I imagined him in the tumbling bedroom, of course! Ha ha, I think I would like Michel Houellebecq turned into a flamingo with a tiny backpack for some reason. Love copyrighting his name retroactive to the days of the cavemen and suing everyone throughout recorded history who’s ever used his name in a sentence for copyright infringement, G. ** David Ehrenstein, Thanks for re-linking. I’m not sure about ‘best thing’, but they were/are awfully great, that’s for damned sure. Thank you for your knowledge and insight! ** Misanthrope, I’m pretty good at spotting sociopaths, but it took me a long time, and they do still sneak through the old defences sometimes. This week! Awesome! Curious what press you guys have in mind, but I’ll wait until the reveal is appropriate. Well, yeah, back cover copy is definitely a plus. I’m terrible at that selling point stuff, but I imagine you’ll sort it. ** Ah, the Kuchars had a quietening effect on you lot, interesting. Not sure if my “pet” “shop” will fare any better, but there’s only one way to find out. See you tomorrow.

* (restored)

 

Introduction
by John Waters

George and Mike Kuchar’s films were my first inspiration. George’s ”Hold Me While I’m Naked,” Mike’s ”Sins of the Fleshapoids” — these were the pivotal films of my youth, bigger influences than Warhol, Kenneth Anger, even ”The Wizard of Oz.” As a Baltimore teenager in the mid-60’s, I initially read about these filmmaking brothers from the Bronx in Jonas Mekas’s Village Voice column, Movie Journal. Here were directors I could idolize — complete crackpots without an ounce of pretension, outsiders to even ”underground” sensibilities who made exactly the films they wanted to make, without any money, starring their friends. Devouring my favorite magazine of the time, Film Culture, I learned more about their entirely original work, the lurid plot lines, their home-grown movie goddesses, the ludicrous thrift-store costuming — it was enough to make me run away to New York to actually see one of their opuses.

Boy, was I not disappointed. There it was on the silver screen — the Kuchars’ famous low-rent Douglas Sirk lighting, the melodramatic soundtracks stolen from bad Hollywood films, male and female nudity. A vision so peculiar, so hilarious, good-natured and proudly pitiful that I realized (with a little help from LSD) that I too could make the films of my dreams. The Kuchar brothers gave me the self-confidence to believe in my own tawdry vision. I went back to Baltimore, renamed a neighborhood friend Divine and made my first real trash epic, ”The Roman Candles.”

The real heyday of ”underground movies” didn’t last long in the 60’s, but the Kuchar brothers have managed to survive with their sense of humor and original style intact. They didn’t want to cross over. They still make funny, sexy, insanely optimistic films and videos every day of their lives, and nobody tells them what to do or how to make it more ”commercial.” The Kuchars may be the only real underground filmmakers left working in American today.

Come on, MacArthur grant committee. What are you waiting for? Every year I expect to see the Kuchars’ names on the list of your so-called genius awards, but so far no luck. If they don’t deserve it, who does?

— from ‘Reflections From a Cinematic Cesspool’

 

1.

Mike Kuchar ‘The Craven Sluck’ (1967)

‘The Craven Sluck seems like a practical primer for John Water’s mischievous Mondo Trasho as well as his far more accomplished Multiple Maniacs. Like Mondo, Sluck is shot in black and white, features a blousy blond out cruising for men, and deals with wholly desperate and debauched characters. Maniacs uses Kuchar’s unconventional narrative style, along with an equally surreal yet satisfying ending to create artistic anarchy. The best part about Sluck is its star. Forty-plus year old Floraine Connors (a Kuchar company member) does her best bombshell gone to seed shimmy as the sexually frustrated spouse of a bumbling bloated husband. Her silent scenes (dialogue was later dubbed in to give some semblance of a storyline), including a couple of inspired “glamour fits” are absolutely hilarious and she really wants to come across as the middle-aged answer to Marilyn Monroe. Unfortunately, she’s more like Mamie Van Doren circa an episode of Fantasy Island. Still, we want to follow this flubbery femme if only because her passions practically pulsate off the screen.’ — Bill Gibron, DVD Talk

 

2.

Watch George Kuchar’s ‘Corruption of the Damned’

Corruption of the Damned Without the corruption of the damned

‘Kuchar’s films are overtly insane. Anyone who lived in such a world would be mad inside an hour. Perhaps the Marx Brothers might survive, but I doubt it. Godzilla, King of the Monsters, might have a better chance. But the utter insanity, the insanity of perverted cliche, is the genuine unwholesome appeal of Kuchar’s outlook. CORRUPTION might seethe with violence and sex, the two most attractive things you can put on the screen, but beneath them a twisted outlook pervades. Something is very much wrong with the Kuchar world.’ — Leonard Lipton, Berkeley Barb 1965

 

3.

George Kuchar ‘The Mongreloid’ (1978)

‘This short film by George Kuchar may be the best thing I’ve seen by the master of madcapped melodrama. A man, his dog, and the regions they inhabited, each leaving his own distinctive mark on the landscape. Not even time can wash the residue of what they left behind. “The MONGRELOID documents my relationship with my dog and parts of it were shot by an ex-student of mine so I guess you can look at it as him getting his revenge since I was photographed in my own habitat which makes me automatically look like an idiot.” – George Kuchar’ — Made out of Mouth

 

4.

Mike Kuchar ‘Sins of the Fleshapoids’ (1965)

‘Along with Anger’s SCORPIO RISING and Warhol’s CHELSEA GIRLS, Mike Kuchar’s SINS OF THE FLESHAPOIDS remains one of the most influential films of the ’60s American Underground. Mike and his brother George (who co-wrote FLESHAPOIDS), were the godfathers of bargain basement cinema, pioneering a hilariously campy, lurid style between Ed Wood exploitation and Douglas Sirk melodrama. Set a million years in the future, after “The Great War” has scourged the planet, mankind has forsaken science for self-indulgence in all the carnal pleasures afforded by art, food, and lust. Work is left to a race of enslaved androids. One rebellious male robot (Bob Cowan) tires of pampering his lazy masters, and joins the humans in sin.’ — Other Cinema

 

5.

George Kuchar ‘Pagan Rhapsody’, Parts 2 & 3 (1970)

‘Since this was Jane Elford and Lloyd Williams’ first big acting roles, I made the music very loud so it would sweep them to stardom. She once hurt Bob Cowan’s back by sitting on it so this time I had her laying on his stomach. Donna Kerness was pregnant during her scenes but her stomach was kept pretty much in shadow and it’s not noticeable. My stomach was the same as always except it contained more mocha cake than usual since that type of cake was usually around when I filmed in Brooklyn Heights. Being that the picture was made in the winter, there are no outdoor scenes because it’s too cold and when the characters have to suddenly flee a tense situation, it’s too time consuming to have them put on a coat and gloves. Originally not scheduled as a tragedy, things swiftly changed as the months made me more and more sour as I plummet down that incinerator shaft I call my life.’ — George Kuchar

 

6.

George Kuchar’s ‘I, An Actress’ (1977)

‘I, an Actress features Kuchar as a teacher in San Francisco showing an acting student how things should be done. It’s hilarious and self-explanatory], so instead of saying more about it, and because it features Kuchar in his real-life role, I’ll quote a few lines from Kuchar’s essay “Teaching Film” about realism: ‘Realism only comes to the screen when the film jams in the projector and the image begins to bubble. An instinctual fear of the dark manifests when the projection light fails…heightened by the little furry things with long tails that scamper beneath the seats. The electrical nature of sex becomes apparent as the hair on your neck bristles when that pervert to your left makes knee contact. In these moments of truth, cinema reveals her face of realism’.’ — Douglas Crimp

 

7.

Mike Kuchar ‘Definitely No, Possibly Yes’ (1:45)

‘Mike Kuchar’s video of a downtown NY art gallery opening on Halloween’ — Artflux

 

8.

George Kuchar ‘Butter Balls’ (2003)

‘I made two films working with film and theater students as my collaborating cast and crew. To counteract the talkie I had done with graduate student the day before, this undergrad project has no dialogue but just a steady stream of images we dreamed up on the spot. A psychodrama that’s heavy on the beefcake, our picture deals with the sexual dementia of a sex addict undergoing hypnotherapy. It’s a mixture of fantasy and desire with some animals thrown in and lots of strange angles of the leading actor’s attributes.’ — George Kuchar

 

9.

This is George Kuchar: The Making of Queen Konga’ (2006)

Documentary short on the making of Queen Conga by Ronaldo Barbachano, 2006, 12 min., video. Featuring interviews/performances by, Linda Martinez, Bob Moricz, Evie Mpras, and others.

 

10.

A short interview with Mike Kuchar, 2007 (8:13)

 

 

 

*

p.s. Hey. ** Dominik, Hi, D!!!! So far so good: my back. I wondered if, due to your counselling work, you would pick the first option. Truth be told, I probably would too. But I’d charge them a lot. A lot. There must be people who’ve tried or even ‘succeeded’ in contacting Richey Edwards through a seance or that sort of thing, no? Love stuffing his bedroom inside a tumbler, G. ** cal Hi, cal. I just saw your email in my box and I’ll open it and get back to you. Thanks for the link/video. Yum. Have a super swell beginning to your weekend. ** _Black_Acrylic, Whew, good news about your dad. Continued psychic balm from my end. And good news galore in the form of the dawning of a new PT! Everyone, Have you hopped on _Black_Acrylic’s Play Therapy train yet? Yes, no? If no, whatever’s stopping you is a liar. Here’s your new chance, and, dudes, seriously, take it and shake it. _B_A: ‘The new episode of Play Therapy is online here via Mixcloud! Ben ‘Jack Your Body’ Robinson returns to bring you Algerian rhythms, Minimal Synth and some Italo curios too.’ ** David, Thanks, bud. RIP Meatloaf, yes, the prime interpreter/singer of the great songbook of the great auteur songwriter Jim Steinman for which Meatloaf will always be immortal. Enjoy whatever Eastbourne is. ** David Ehrenstein, Non-link. But I assume it was Meatloaf related. RIP ** Maria, Isabella, Camila, Malaria, Gabriela, Hi, lustrous crowd. Yes, Tears for the Loaf. As a nearly lifelong vegetarian/vegan I prefer my meatloaf with a human, singing face, but thank you for the thought. Have what I can only imagine will be an exciting weekend. ** Bill, That TM moment does stand out within the oeuvre of my otherwise drab and terrifying dream life. ‘History of the Occult’ sounds very intriguing indeed. I’ll check my sources. Thank you, sir. I hope SF coddles you through Monday morning at the very least. ** Steve Erickson, ‘I Would Do Anything For Love (But I Won’t Do That)’ is such a great song. I should have included it in my faves the other day. Maybe not as great as ‘My Feet Keep Dancing’, but what could be? I will most certainly take a peek and listen re: Hainbach’s youtube channel. News to me. Thank you! ** Okay. Another restoration for your this weekend, this one celebrating the works by the unimpeachable avant-film creators the Kuchar Brothers. Plunk yourself down on one of the imaginary folding chairs and do yourselves a world of good maybe? See you on Monday one way or another.