The blog of author Dennis Cooper

Dead Museums *

* (restored)

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Icelandic Phallological Museum (Reykjavík, Iceland)
‘The Iceland Phallological Museum was the premier institution to learn about the male sex organ, described on its website as “probably the only museum in the world to contain a collection of phallic specimens.” There was no pornography, but you could admire 276 penises, from the tiniest hamster member (two millimeters) to the colossal private parts of a sperm whale (1.7 meters). The museum received its first human exhibit from a 95-year-old Icelandic man in 2011.’

 

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British Lawnmower Museum (Merseyside, England)
‘What some might consider an icon of the worst aspect of suburbia was cherished at the British Lawnmower Museum, which detailed the history of the push-powered garden tool. Wanted to see the first solar-powered robot grass-chopper, or the original mower itself, transformed from a contraption used to hem guards’ uniforms? This museum was for you. From royal lawnmowers belonging to Prince Charles and Princess Diana, to the world’s most expensive lawnmowers, this place allowed everyone to at least talk up appearances even if you couldn’t keep them.’

 

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The Museum of Funeral Customs (Springfield, IL)
‘The museum was near Oak Ridge Cemetery, the site of Abraham Lincoln’s tomb. Collections at the museum included a re-created 1920s embalming room, coffins and funeral paraphernalia from various cultures and times, examples of post-mortem photography, and a scale model of Lincoln’s funeral train. A gift shop provided books and funeral-related gifts, including coffin-shaped keychains and chocolates. The museum was closed in March 2009 due to poor attendance.’

 

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Farm Implement Museum (Bloomfield, CT)
‘When former migrant worker Wentworth T. Phillips opened his museum, he received an $80,000 loan from the Small Business Administration to develop the museum’s six acres of land and to cover initial operating costs. He also received two grants, for $10,000 and $25,000, from the State Department of Economic Development. Otherwise he has run the museum single-handedly, taking in less than $2,000 a year. Since 1980, he said, he has made only one loan repayment. In 1987, the Small Business Administration began foreclosure proceedings on his house, which he had used as collateral, said Hunter Lohman, deputy district director for the administration’s office in Hartford. Mr. Phillips has been allowed to remain in his house, where he operates an antique and clock repair business. However, Mr. Lohman said if Mr. Phillips did not repay the loan shortly his house and museum collection would be auctioned.’

 

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The Criminals Hall of Fame Wax Museum (Niagara Falls)
‘The Criminals Hall of Fame Wax Museum was a wax museum on 5751 Victoria Avenue in Niagara Falls, Ontario, Canada. One of many wax museums in the region, it was located at the top of Clifton Hill. The museum featured forty wax statues of notorious criminals, from mobsters to serial killers. The museum was created in 1977 and closed late 2014. In 2002, columnist Gene Collier of the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette characterized the museum as “a cheesy little monument to brutality,” while in 2005, the same paper’s Dennis Roddy called it “a garish little exhibit.”In 2003, the Boston Herald dubbed it “tacky.” In 2010, Doug Kirby’s roadsideamerica.com noted in its review that the museum had “more gore than most horror wax museums and better lighting, too,” which it took as “a good indication that this attraction is drawing enough of a crowd to pay its electric bill.” Among the museum’s featured criminals were contemporary serial killers such as Ted Bundy, Jeffrey Dahmer, John Wayne Gacy and Charles Manson, which are interspersed with infamous historical figures like Billy the Kid, Pretty Boy Floyd, Clyde Chestnut Barrow, Lucky Luciano, Jesse James, Al Capone and Elizabeth Báthory. In 1999, the figure of Adolf Hitler was stolen from its glass case.’

 

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The Kerosene Lamp Museum (Winchester Center, CT)
This is the Kerosene Lamp museum. It is no longer open; the proprietor died a few years back.

 

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The Liberace Museum (Paradise, NV)
‘The Liberace Museum housed many stage costumes, cars, jewelry, lavishly decorated pianos and numerous citations for philanthropic acts that belonged to the American entertainer and pianist Wladziu Valentino Liberace, better known as Liberace. The non-profit museum funded the Liberace Foundation for the Performing and Creative Arts. The museum closed to the public on October 17, 2010, due to a drop in admissions. In January 2013, the Liberace Foundation announced plans to relocate the museum to Downtown Las Vegas, with a targeted opening date of January 2014. Those plans never materialized.’

 

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The Umbrella Cover Museum (Peaks Island, OR)
Nancy Hoffman’s museum (1994 – 2013) began when she realized that so many umbrella covers get tossed aside, but kept for no real reason. Until its closure due to lack of attendance one could visit the museum by taking the ferry from Portland to Peaks Island.

 

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Hua Huan Museum (Kyoto, Japan)
‘The front of the building has a big sign in the upper corner, reading “全和凰美術館” (Zen Kowako Museum), and searching around on the Internet after I got home I found an older photo of the metal shutter, fully closed indicating the name in English as Hua Huan Museum. I’m guessing that Kowako Zen was the professional name used by the artist whose real name was Hua Huan. From what I have been able to figure out while searching, he was born in Korea in 1909, came to Japan when he was 30, eventually apprenticed under Kunitaro Suda (1891-1961), a Kyoto painter apparently noteworthy enough to have a Wikipedia entry. He was apparently a successful artist. In 1982 there was an exhibition “50 years of work by Kowako Zen” hosted in five cities in Japan and Korea, and perhaps emboldened by that, in the same year he founded the museum.’

 

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Eight Track Museum (Dallas, TX)
‘Established 2010. Preservation and presentation of all audio recording formats from the 1800’s to present day, while focusing on the 8 track tape.Visitors may photograph, video, and linger. Fantastic t shirts and yes, 8 track tapes, for sale in the gift shop. Visits are available by appointment. Closed 2016.’

 

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Mad Max 2 Museum (Silverton, Australia)
‘Opened in 2010, the museum was the work of one Adrian Bennett who saw the films Mad Max and Mad Max 2: The Road Warrior and was instantly changed. After seeing the movies he became obsessed with finding out all he could about them, searching for props and other artifacts like a wastelander searches for gas. His obsession eventually led him to move to Silverton, Australia, one of the places where the films actually shot. It was here that he established his museum, putting his extensive Mad Max collection of display and outfitting his yard like a post-apocalyptic shack.

‘The museum featured an assortment of full-size costumes and props as well as an extensive collection of photographs and production stills, but the gems of the collection had to be the working replica cars, one of which was actually used as the Road Warrior’s car. Sadly, the museum closed in 2019 for refurbishing and never reopened, an early victim of the Covid pandemic.’

 

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The Warren Occult Museum (Monroe, CT)
‘Ed and Lorraine Warren are some of the most well-known names in paranormal research in America. Ed spent his childhood in a haunted house, and not long after they were married, they found themselves drawn to some of the most haunted locations across America. They’re perhaps most noted for winning a court case for a woman and child who claimed their house was haunted and uninhabitable – something that hadn’t been disclosed at the time they signed the lease. The Warrens found proof for her that held up in court, and their recently closed museum held almost countless other examples of their work. Many of the artifacts that made their way into their possession were on display in the museum, and this was one place that you definitely, absolutely, 100 per cent for sure didn’t want to touch anything… because you might have been taking home more than you came with. You could see Satanic idols, conjuring mirrors, real shrunken heads, masks, instruments that are said to play themselves, and not a few possessed items.’

 

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The Burnt Food Museum (Arlington, MA)
Containing “some of the best carbonized culinary artwork in the world,” the Burnt Food Museum was started when founder and curator Deborah Henson-Conant put some apple cider on the stove to heat up, got distracted by a long phone call, and came back to find the cider burnt down to a black crust. Until her death in 2015, submissions poured in from all over, like “Kruncheroni ‘N Cheese,” from a couple whose son messed up microwaving mac and cheese and hid the burnt remains under his bed in shame, and “Honey, I Found It!,” a pan of cooking utensils accidentally melted to a baking sheet left in the oven for storage.

 

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The Al Capone Story (Chicago)
‘Opened in 1995, It featured animatronic figures.This show explained the 1920’s and the Capone story from beginning to end. The museum was closed for many reasons. 1) It didn’t make the owners the money projected. 2) The owners were offered more than what they had paid for the property. 3) The protesting by the Italian community of Chicago, who was upset at the glorification of a criminal. They had opposed the project from it’s inception and during it’s short existance. The city and Mayor Daley was quite happy to see it go.’

 

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The John Lennon Museum (Saitama, Japan)
‘To those of you who’ve loved the John Lennon Museum: John Lennon’s destiny spanned the whole world. His spirit came alive through movement, and without movement, it dies. If the Museum which houses his spirit never moved, it would be a grave, not a Museum. John does not have a grave. When he passed on, I publicly announced that I would not be holding a funeral for him. I did so because I knew his spirit would live forever. After ten years here, John’s spirit is now moving on—looking onward to the next journey. Thanks to your love for the Museum, what we’d thought would be five years became ten. 

I’m so grateful to those of you who’ve loved the John Lennon Museum. John’s spirit lives on in each one of you, and I know your spirits will be the power of love that brings peace to the world. Thank you, everyone!’ — Yoko Ono

 

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UCM Museum (Abita Springs, LA)
‘A labor of love for artist John Preble, the UCM Museum (pronounced “you-see-’em museum) opened in 2000 and featured everything from the “House of Shards,” bejeweled with chunks of shattered pottery, to “Aliens Trashed Our Airstream Trailer,” a mobil home impaled by a flying saucer. Elsewhere, the museum housed Buford the Bassigator, a collection of pocket combs and paint-by-number masterworks, a shrine to Elvis, and a miniature river town.’

 

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Mickey’s Museum (Coffs Harbour, Wales)

 

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The Tooth Fairy Museum (Deerfield, IL)
‘The Tooth Fairy Museum was located in the split-level ranch home on 1129 Cherry Street in suburban Deerfield, Illinois. Created in 1993, the non-profit Tooth Fairy Museum was operated by Dr. Rosemary S. Wells, a former professor at the Northwestern University Dental School. She was considered be the world’s tooth fairy expert. The museum portion of her home contained more than 100 tooth fairy dolls, about 700 drawings by kids, books, pillows, paintings, sculptures and boxes designed to hold baby teeth. Upon her death on May 18, 2000 at the age of 69 at the Whitehall North Nursing Home, her husband sold all of her memorabilia which represented tooth fairies from many different ethnic groups and cultures.’

 

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Glore Psychiatric Museum (St, Joseph, Missouri)
‘Located in Saint Joseph, Missouri, the museum chronicled the life of not only the St. Joseph State Hospital, but the mental health division that was once called State Lunatic Asylum No. 2. Developed by former employee George Glore (Glore passed away in 2010), the museum showcased nothing short of torture devices once used in the treatment of the mentally ill not only at the asylum, but throughout history. Some of the older pieces included the Lunatic Box, which was exactly that – a large box where people would be forced to stand, for hours in darkness and isolation, until they were deemed calm enough to be released back into the general population. Just as nightmarish was the Tranquilizer Chair, where patients were strapped in order to allow the doctors to perform their treatments with relative ease. There was the Bath of Surprise, which dumped a patient into ice water, there were bleeding knives that were once used to drain blood from patients to cure a variety of illnesses, and there was even a giant treadmill, which was little more than a hamster wheel for patients who needed a little more exercise than normal to release their pent-up energy. Artwork done by patients over the years gave visitors a look into the more intimate thoughts of the people who were being held at the hospital, and another creepy piece of artwork was made up of nearly 1,500 items extracted from the stomach of a patient – including nails, spoons and the tops of salt and pepper shakers.’

 

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Salisbury Cannon Museum (Salisbury, CT)
‘The museum was located next to the historic site of Connecticut’s first iron blast furnace that was originally built by Ethan Allen and Samuel Forbes in 1762.’


 

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Morbid Anatomy Museum
‘The Museum was conceived, organized and planned by Joanna Ebenstein, Tracy Hurley Martin, Colin Dickey, and Aaron Beebe and located at 424a Third Avenue in Brooklyn, a former nightclub building the interior of which was re-modeled by architects Robert Kirkbride and Tony Cohn in 2014. In Ebenstein’s words, the new space was designed to give a home for a “regular lecture series and DIY intellectual salon that brings together artists, writers, curators and passionate amateurs dedicated to what [Joanna Ebenstein] sums up as ‘the things that fall through the cracks'”. The space focused on forgotten or neglected histories through exhibitions, education and public programming.[7] Themes included nature, death and society, anatomy, medicine, arcane media, and curiosity and curiosities broadly considered. The artifacts featured in its rotating exhibitions were drawn from private collections and museums’ storage spaces.’

 

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The Bagpipe Museum (Ellicott City, MD)
‘The museum displayed a collection of over a hundred bagpipes from throughout Europe, and maintained a large collection of bagpipe recordings and publications, as well as reproducing rare sheet music for the pipes.’

 

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The Women’s Museum: An Institute for the Future (Dallas, TX)
‘The Women’s Museum: An Institute for the Future was a museum located inside Fair Park in Dallas, Texas (USA), covering the subject of American women’s history. The Women’s Museum’s 70,000 square foot building provided a home for programs and exhibits where people could honor the past and explore the contributions of women throughout history. The museum closed on October 31, 2011 due to lack of funds.’

 

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Submarine Museum (Middletown, CT)
‘Ben Bastura and his brother started this outstanding museum in 1954 and added to it ever since. It was the largest privately owned Submarine Museum in the United States. It was a totally private endeavor that had been Ben’s avocation over the years. He had 18 full file cabinets that contain a wealth of pictures and information on every boat from the USS HOLLAND to the newest Trident boats. Ben lived in an old fashioned duplex which was approximately 70 years old. Bernard occupied 3 rooms as living quarters, the other 9 rooms, upstairs and downstairs were used for the museum.’

 

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Hollywood Erotic Museum (Hollywood, CA)
‘The Hollywood Erotic Museum was an adults-only museum located on Hollywood Boulevard in Hollywood, California specializing in sexual history in Hollywood. It closed down in mid-2006 due to lack of business. The museum featured many different items, including original etchings by Pablo Picasso as well as a legendary stag film dating back to 1948 that is allegedly of Marilyn Monroe having sex with an unnamed man. The video owned by the museum is the only known copy in existence.’

 

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The International Banana Club Museum (Apple Valley, CA)
Ken “T.B.” (for “Top Banana”) Bannister dubbed himself leader of the International Banana Club in 1972 as a way to get his name out there during a convention, and soon started receiving gifts of bananas and banana paraphernalia from around the world. He created the museum (a room in his home) in 1976 to house all that banana action, and adopted the persona of “The Banana Man,” appearing on countless TV shows, and accepted applications to join the club (where you could earn a doctorate, or “PhB,” in Bananistry).

 

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Fresno Metropolitan Museum (Fresno, CA)
‘The son of famed photographer Ansel Adams is suing California’s Fresno Metropolitan Museum to keep the bankrupt museum from selling six works by his father. He says the sale would violate a donation agreement. Museum officials have been talking to various auction houses about selling the works, including “Moon and Half Dome,” in order to pay off creditors.’

 

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Graceland Too (Holly Springs, MS)
‘Graceland Too was Paul MacLeod’s two-story home and shrine to Elvis Presley in Holly Springs, Mississippi. It was open to the public twenty-four hours a day, every day, all year. The house was crammed with Elvis paraphernalia to the point of being a fire hazard. MacLeod was renowned for his eccentricity, based upon his reverence for Elvis, and his claim to drink at least two dozen cans of soda per day. The town’s assistant director of tourism, Suzann William, claims MacLeod is Holly Springs’ number one tourism attraction. The house was originally painted pink, then white, and in 2012 it became a vivid, Mediterranean blue with American Flags and painted navy blue pine trees. On July 15, 2014, a man named Dwight David Taylor Jr. was shot by MacLeod just inside of the front door of the house. According to police, Taylor banged on the door of the house around 11 p.m. asking for money. He tried to force his way into the home and broke the glass on the front door. After Taylor refused to leave, MacLeod shot him. Taylor died from a gunshot wound to the chest. MacLeod cooperated with police and was released. No charges were filed. On July 17, 2014, MacLeod was found dead on the porch by someone driving by the house around 7 a.m. MacLeod’s attorney, Phillip K. Knecht, said in a statement that MacLeod had been “battling ill health for some time”. He added, “We can’t be sure of anything right now, but nothing points to suicide or foul play. We await an official autopsy, but his ill health, combined with the stress from Monday’s tragedy, leads me to believe it was a very unfortunate natural occurrence”. The contents of Graceland Too went up for auction on January 31, 2015. Well over 100 people showed up for the auction on the Graceland Too site, many having travelled hundreds of miles in the hope of buying an Elvis treasure or a memory of Graceland Too. Many in the crowd were disappointed and dispirited when the entire lot of items was sold for a reported $54,500 to an anonymous buyer from Georgia.’

 

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Numismatic Museum of Aruba (Oranjestad, Aruba)
‘Don Quichote & Sancho Panza guarded the entrance of the Numismatic Museum. The Numismatic museum was established on November 13, 1981 and lodged the private collection of Mr. J. Mario Odor and was the first Numismatic museum established on Aruba. The museum contained over 35.000 different pieces covering over 400 countries. The fantastic collection consisted of about 115 different collections, a.o.: Primitive, Strange, Proof, Zoo, Counterstamp, Overstruck, Mini, Chop coins, Leprosium, Errors, Gold, Ration, F.A.O., Square, Dollars & Crowns, Commemoratives, Centerhold, Scalloped, Tokens, Wooden, Food coupons, and also Chips, Medals and much more. Mr. Odor the founder passed away February 25th 2001, and the museum closed shortly thereafter.’

 

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Museum of Witchcraft and Magic (Gatlinburg, TN)
‘The World of the Unexplained was opened in 1972 by Ripley’s Believe It or Not! in Gatlinburg, Tennessee, originally called “Museum of Witchcraft and Magic”. In 1975, due to pressure from the local churches and religious groups in the area, Ripley’s changed their names to “World of the Unexplained” and re-outfitted them with new attractions. With the popularity of the television show “In Search Of”, Ripley’s hired the show’s narrator, Leonard Nimoy, to film a short introduction to visitors at the entrance to the museums. The museums displayed not only witchcraft attractions but new ones that featured Bigfoot, flying saucers, the Bermuda Triangle, werewolves, and a fortune teller with a talking crystal ball. In 1985 the museums closed down for good, due to poor ticket sales.’

 

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The Frank Chiarenza Museum of Glass (Meridien, CT)
‘Over 2,500 items, primarily of American (including Meriden), French and English manufacturers, were featured, including Milk Glass of various colors, in an extensive variety of dishes with figural animal covers, figural bottles, ink wells, candy containers, souvenir presentations, and Victorian novelties.’

 

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Shania Twain Centre (Timmins, Canada)
‘A Shania Twain museum in Timmins is being turned into an open-pit mine after tourists stayed away in droves. It just didn’t impress them much. According to the Canadian Press, construction of the museum and related attractions gobbled up $10 million in public funding. By 2010 attendance was so low and operating losses so severe that welcoming each museum-goer cost taxpayers $33.72. That’s a staggering burden. Theoretically, it would have made more financial sense to hand a $20 bill to prospective visitors arriving at the door and telling them to shove off.’

 

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Audrey Hepburn Museum (Tolochenaz, Switzerland)
‘Audrey Hepburn found her haven of peace in Tolochenaz. She lived in this house for some thirty years, looked after her family and enjoyed a life out of public eye. Cultivating her vegetable garden and going to the market in Morges were some of the activities she enjoyed in peace and quiet. It was also at La Paisible that she passed away on 20 January 1993. It was subsequently turned into a museum dedicated to her which closed due to lock of public interest in 2010.’


 

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Presidents Park (Williamsburg, VA)
‘”Move over Mt. Rushmore! You’ve got company!” So proclaims the brochure for Presidents Park — a wooded retreat in the Black Hills of South Dakota, where citizens can stroll peacefully among the giant heads of the nation’s Chief Executives. Presidents Park is open year round; the asphalt in the parking lot was one month old when we stopped by in 2003. That year, David Adickes, the sculptor who rendered the gargantuan Sam Houston and Houston airport’s George HW Bush statue (“Winds of Change”), opened Presidents Park (and a duplicate near Williamsburg, Virginia in 2004). The 43 heads are arranged chronologically along a path winding up into a rocky knoll of tall pines. George Washington, generally accepted in history as the first President of the USA, looks over the snack bar. The busts are 16-20 feet tall, with the seven greatest Presidents’ heads rendered at about 12 times life-size. Each head is accompanied by an informational display. The climb up the head path is gradual, but a little strenuous for seniors. Knowing their likely audience, the park provides motorized golf carts, and warming enclosures and rest areas along the way.’

 

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R.M.C.M. Ramones Museum (Berlin)
‘If you suffered from horror vacui this was the best place 2 b. Combining the basic punk aesthetic with a wunder kammer, u got 2 travel back to those years when Punk meant something more.’

 

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Carbo’s Police Museum (Pigeon Forge, TN)
‘Carbo’s Police Museum was another long time attraction that existed in Pigeon Forge. Its biggest selling point was that it had a nice collection of artifacts related to legendary hardass Southern Sheriff Buford Pusser. Buford was well known do to the fact that they turned his life story into the movie “Walking Tall”, which was later rebooted to feature The Rock. Buford was notorious for carrying around a board with him to show that he literally carried “a big stick”. During his time as Sheriff, Pusser would be stabbed 7 times and shot eight. He also slapped around a young Jimmy Buffett. Buford would battle local moonshine and prostitution rings, which led to the murder of his wife. Buford himself would die in a mysterious car crash that is often thought to be sabotaged (although some claim he was simply driving drunk). The Drive By Truckers have asong about the Sheriff called The Buford Stick. The museum had Buford’s stick on display as well as the wreckage of the car he died in. The Museum went out of business a few years back and is now a t-shirt shop.’

 

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The Rosa Ponselle Museum (Meridien, CT)
‘With an upcoming concert tribute to Rosa Ponselle, money from a fund in her name will be depleted. Coupled with the closure of the Rosa Ponselle museum, it appears the last of the famed opera diva’s bequest to Meriden will soon be gone. In a concert billed as “The Final Tribute to Rosa Ponselle,” the Greater Hartford Opera Ensemble will perform arias sung by the Meriden-born star, and various operatic selections, including music from “Tosca,” “La Traviata” and “The Merry Widow.” The performance begins at 4 p.m. June 14 at the Augusta Curtis Cultural Center, on East Main Street. “We know this is going to be the last of the money from the foundation, but Rosa Ponselle’s is a voice that will live on in history for years,” said Nancy V. Stewart, artistic director of the opera ensemble. “That is never going away. She was a great, great star, a diva.”‘

 

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National Shaving and Barbershop Museum (Meridien, CT)
‘A casual offer from his mother of his “grandpa’s old shaving mug and straight razor” set Lester Dequaine on a quest that has grown to such an impressive size that his vast collection of barber paraphernalia could have filled a museum. Then it did. The National Shaving and Barbershop Museum opened in 1999 in Meriden, Connecticut in a 1920s building bought and lavishly restored by Dequaine, a retired businessman. Then, in 2005, it closed.’

 

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The Dog Mushing Museum (Fairbanks, AK)
‘Bouchard’s International Dog Mushing and Sled Museum closed its doors for good Aug. 26. Museum owner Kyia Bouchard confirmed the closure in a phone interview Thursday. “I went broke. There was no support from the town or the people,” Bouchard said. “So I’m selling it. There’s a couple dog mushers that are interested in opening a museum.” Bouchard is disappointed with the community’s lack of support. Despite racking up 190 Trip Advisor reviews in 11 months, many of them five-star reviews, she said people weren’t drawn into the museum.’

 

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World’s Smallest Museum (near Phoenix, AZ)
‘The World’s Smallest Museum was only 134 square feet, so it didn’t take long to see everything.’

 

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National Pinball Museum (Washington, DC)
‘Ah, pinball. I love pinball. I’m not sure where this love came from. I have an early memory of playing pinball in a hotel arcade on family trip to New Jersey. I grew up with friends that had pinball machines in there homes. Yup more than one friend actually pinball machine there house. Must be a North Beverly thing. Personally I find the history pinball pretty cool. Although I had actually read an article somewhere on the history of pinball so I didn’t feel the need to spend tons of time looking through that part of the museum. Pinball is definitely a large piece of Americana. I found the pinball machine area a bit small but lots of cool and interesting games. Was extremely impressed by the big sister’s pinball skills. had no idea she could play like that, but I digress. We got lucky and the pinball museum was running a special that admission for two was $21 and we got 8 free games, but we didn’t know this and would have been willing to pay the normal $13.50 each plus gaming costs. Was also disappointed in the giftshop selections. Not much there was hoping for some postcards to send to other pinball loving friends but no such luck. Got a magnet for the bf.’

 

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The Bead Museum (Glendale, AZ)
‘The Bead Museum was founded to establish a haven for a permanent collection of beads and adornments of all cultures, past and present, which would provide an enduring opportunity for the study and enjoyment of these magnificent examples of art and ingenuity. The Bead Museum served the public through exhibitions and programs designed to heighten awareness of peoples’ ideas about themselves and their world through the study of beads.’

 

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Sparta Teapot Museum (Sparta, NC)
‘The museum drew mainly from the teapot collection of Gloria and Sonny Kamm. The Kamm Collection, comprising more than 6,000 teapots, is the largest teapot collection in the USA and arguably the world. The Sparta Teapot Museum received its official 501(c)(3) status from the Internal Revenue Service in November 2005. This designation made the Museum a charity organization. In 2006, Congress controversially appropriated nearly $500,000 in federal funding for construction of a new building for the Teapot Museum, but the project was canceled before any of the money left federal hands.’

 

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The Conspiracy Museum (Dallas, TX)
‘The Conspiracy Museum was a private exhibition of conspiracy theories in the West End Historic District of downtown Dallas, Texas (USA). R.B. Cutler, self-described as an “assassinologist”, opened the museum in 1995. The Conspiracy Museum was located across the street from the Kennedy Memorial in Dallas, Texas in the Katy Building. The museum was not limited in scope to the conspiracy theories surrounding the assassination of John F. Kennedy, but it also covered Robert F. Kennedy, Martin Luther King, Abraham Lincoln, and Ted Kennedy’s Chappaquiddick incident. Cutler’s argument was that all these conspiracies can be tied together. The museum was often overlooked by visitors heading to the more well-known Sixth Floor Museum. The museum closed on December 30, 2006, having lost its lease. The building’s owners announced that a Quiznos sandwich shop would take its place.’

 

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Smith Museum of Stained Glass Windows (Chicago)
‘The museum was located along a strip of shops, theatres, and restaurants, and admission was free. Most of the windows in the museum were illuminated with artificial light to highlight the colors and intricate details. Since each piece was protected by a layer of bulletproof glass, patrons were encouraged to come close to the works and even bring food into the galleries.’

 

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Madison Museum of Bathroom Tissue (Madison, WI)
‘The Madison Museum of Bathroom Tissue was established in 1992, and closed in 2000. The museum was co-founded by Carol Kolb and was located at 305 N. Hamilton in Madison, Wisconsin, United States, in a second-floor apartment three blocks from the state capitol. At its peak, the MMBT’s permanent collection contained approximately 3,000 rolls of toilet paper. The toilet paper’s origins ranged from the bathrooms of other museums, like the Metropolitan Museum of Art and the Guggenheim, to American tourist destinations like Wall Drug and Graceland. The museum also had European, African, Australian, Canadian, and Mexican toilet paper as well as a collection of toilet paper from bars and restaurants located in Madison. The Manufacturers Wing contained a collection of retail samples donated by toilet paper manufacturers.’

 

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Concrete Heritage Museum (Concrete, WA)
‘The museum was founded in early 1980s by a retired Concrete judge, Herb Larsen. The museum incorporated historical collections related to the national cement industry. Just before closing in September 2009, the museum opened an exhibit displaying the contents of the time capsule that was interred on August 11, 1932 by the now defunct Superior Portland Cement Company.’

 

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Dinosaur Walk Museum (Pigeon Forge, TN)
‘Dinosaur Walk Museum featured life-size sculptures of dinosaurs. All of the exhibits, which represented 47 species, were recreated life-size and were based upon actual fossil records. Some of the exhibits included: Tyrannosaurus rex, Platecarpus, Parasaurolophus, Daspletosaurus, Deinonychus, Coelophysis, Velociraptor, Troodon, Plesiosaurs, Oviraptor, large and small flying reptiles and the skulls, bones, and skeletons of prehistoric mammals, fossils and other items of interest. Hand painted murals surrounded the 17,000-square-foot (1,600 m2), two-level museum. The museum also featured two high-definition movie theaters with continuous educational dinosaur movies, hands-on activities for children, and a gift shop.’

 

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Kissimmee Horror Memorabilia Museum (Kissimmee, FL)
‘The museum’s moldering remains at 4710 East Irlo Bronson Memorial Highway are now used as a training area for the Fire Department.’

 

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Ancient America (Boca Raton, FL)
‘E. G. Barnhill was fascinated by American Indian culture, which he studied and collected in his spare time. In 1953 he opened a museum, Ancient America, on twenty-five acres on US 1 in the area that is now the upscale Sanctuary community of Boca Raton. The grounds included an ancient Calusa Indian mound and burial ground which he excavated, with the help of archaeologists, and prepared for display to the public by tunneling into the mound and installing glass walls so that the contents could be seen. Ancient America only lasted a few years. When visitors didn’t show much interest in his museum Barnhill sold the land and packed up his artifacts, grousing that “all these tourists are interested in are dog tracks and nightclubs.”‘

 

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Tom Gaskins’ Cypress Knee Museum (Palmdale, FL)
‘Come see Tom’s knees said the crudely made signs, fashioned from twisted cypress tree parts with big black letters. Lady if he won’t stop, hit him on head with shoe. You might still be miles from Palmdale on US 27, and Palmdale was miles from much of anything, but you knew that Tom Gaskins’ Cypress Knee Museum awaited ahead. In the 1930’s Tom became fascinated with cypress knees, those knobby protuberances that cypress trees grow from their roots up above the surface of the swamp water that often surrounds them. He collected them, especially those that looked like something else to him, be it a person or even a “Lady Hippo Wearing A Carmen Miranda Hat.” And he performed experiments on them, making them grow around objects like coke bottles or a telephone receiver, and he tried to control their shapes with wire and weights. Tom wanted to share his cypress knee fever with everyone so he opened a roadside museum, gift shop, and cypress knee factory where he peeled and polished cypress for sale to the tourists. Tom Gaskins died in 1998. Tom’s son, Tom Jr., tried to keep the museum open, but was hampered by an edict by the Lykes company, which owns much of the land in that area, to remove the famous signs from their property. Then thieves broke into the museum one night in 2000 and carted off many of the best pieces, delivering the final blow, and museum shut its doors.’

 

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Barnum’s American Museum (New York City)
‘Barnum’s American Museum was located at the corner of Broadway, Park Row, and Ann Street in what is now the Financial District of Manhattan, New York City, from 1841 to 1865. The museum was owned by famous showman P. T. Barnum. The museum opened on January 1, 1842. Its attractions made it a combination zoo, museum, lecture hall, wax museum, theater and freak show, in what was, at the same time, a central site in the development of American popular culture. Barnum filled the American Museum with dioramas, panoramas, “cosmoramas”, scientific instruments, modern appliances, a flea circus, a loom powered by a dog, the trunk of a tree under which Jesus’ disciples sat, an oyster bar, a rifle range, waxworks, glass blowers, taxidermists, phrenologists, pretty baby contests, Ned the learned seal, the Feejee Mermaid (a mummified monkey’s torso with a fish’s tail), midgets, Chang and Eng the Siamese twins, a menagerie of exotic animals that included beluga whales in an aquarium, giants, Native Americans who performed traditional songs and dances, Grizzly Adams’s trained bears and performances ranging from magicians, ventriloquists and blackface minstrels to adaptations of biblical tales and Uncle Tom’s Cabin.

‘At its peak, the museum was open fifteen hours a day and had as many as 15,000 visitors a day. Some 38 million customers paid the 25 cents admission to visit the museum between 1841 and 1865. The total population of the United States in 1860 was under 32 million. In November 1864, the Confederate Army of Manhattan attempted and failed to burn down the museum, but on July 13, 1865 the American Museum burned to the ground in one of the most spectacular fires New York has ever seen.[9] Animals at the museum were seen jumping from the burning building, only to be shot by police. Many of the animals unable to escape the blaze burned to death in their enclosures, including the two beluga whales who boiled to death in their tanks. It was allegedly during this fire that a fireman by the name of Johnny Denham killed an escaped tiger with his ax before rushing into the burning building and carrying out a 400-pound woman on his shoulders.’

 

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The Museum of Celebrity Leftovers (Cornwall, UK)
‘For nine and a half years Michael Bennett ran The Old Boat Store cafe in Kingsand, Cornwall with his wife Francesca. one day, David Bailey, the photographer, popped in. He had a cheese and tomato sandwich but he left a bit. So thrilled were the Bennetts that Bailey had stopped by that they wanted to commemorate the moment and somehow, “I can’t remember whose idea it was”, they came up with the notion of preserving Bailey’s leftover for posterity.

‘”We kept it wrapped in a paper bag for quite a while,” Michael said, but then Paul Heiney, the TV presenter, came in. “And he left a butter wrapper. And then, about a week later, in came Hugh Dennis. He had an egg sandwich. He didn’t leave any leftovers so I had to pick the eggshell out of the bin. And that’s when we decided to get the mineral specimen jars.”

‘The Museum of Celebrity Leftovers was born. To look at, it’s nothing more than a small decorative shelf covered with petite domes, all of which contain a morsel of food or wrappings. “I wanted to give it an end-of-the-pier feel,” Michael tells me. “It’s a bit of seaside fun. I’m pretty sure it’s the world’s smallest museum. I tried to get it verified by the Guinness Book of Records but for some reason they wouldn’t allow it.” The Museum closed in 2012 when the Bennetts sold the cafe’

 

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The Tragedy In US History Museum (Saint Augustine, FL)
‘Sometimes, all it takes is a man with vision — and a complete lack of taste. The Tragedy In The US Museum sign L.H. “Buddy” Hough was such a man. When President John F. Kennedy was assassinated in 1963, Buddy was suddenly inspired. Why not create a museum dedicated to all the bad things that have happened in United States history? He quickly secured Lee Harvey Oswald’s bedroom furniture and anything else he could get connected to the Kennedy assassination, including a car that Kennedy had once ridden in previous to the shooting, and a wax figure of Oswald himself. Other morbid memorabilia secured by Buddy included a train whistle from “the wreck of the old 97,” a mummy, and what were supposedly the death cars of Jayne Mansfield and Bonnie & Clyde (although, actually, the Mansfield car was the wrong make and the other car was apparently a prop from the Bonnie and Clyde movie).’

 

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National Museum of Patriotism (Atlanta, GA)

 

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Foamhenge (Natural Bridge, VA)
‘As its name suggests, Foamhenge was a one-to-one scale replica of Stonehenge, made of foam. It was identical to the original, save the flecked gray paint, the accompanying statue of a deadhead-ish Merlin, and the fact that it was erected several millennia later. For twelve years, the henge garnered a steady stream of visitors and enough press to be mentioned in the same breath as the area’s actual ancient rocks. Its creator, an artist named Mark Cline, called it his “foam-nomenon”: the unlikely culmination of his career as a sculptor of roadside attractions. But Foamhenge closed for good in August 2016 when the property was repurposed as a state park.’

 

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Bonnie and Clyde Ambush Museum (Gibsland, LA)
‘After the multiple robberies, kidnappings and murders (at least 13) across the States, Bonnie and Clyde’s story came to an abrupt and bloody end when they were ambushed by police and gunned down on a lonely strip of road in the northern Louisiana woods in 1934. The officers responsible for bringing to the end one of the most spectacular manhunts of the 1930s were Frank Hamer, B.M. “Manny” Gault, Bob Alcorn, Ted Hinton, Henderson Jordan and Prentiss Morel Oakley. After his death, Ted Hinton’s son, L.J. “Boots” Hinton, opened the Bonnie and Clyde Ambush Museum filled with the story of notorious pair. In the museum, which was situated until its demise just 8 miles from the ambush site, you could view genuine artefacts from the era such as one of Clyde’s Remington shotguns from the car which they were in when they were shot, glass from the bullet-shattered windscreen of the car, Bonnie’s red tam (hat) and replicas of the tombstones of Bonnie and Clyde.’

 

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Museum of Holography (Chicago)
‘Went here when the posted hours said they’d be open, but they weren’t open. No note, and no response to the buzzer. I asked the cat who appeared to be trapped between the glass door and the inside security gate, but she was more concerned with sunbathing.’

 

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Hedrick Tractor and Truck Museum (Woodland, CA)
‘I was super impressed with this museum. There were so many different models of tractors in here. You could spend hours making your way along this collection. The building itself must’ve been 50,000 sq feet at least. I was really impressed with the level of detail on each placard and the collection as a whole. Totally kid friendly but the collection was interesting enough that adults totally enjoyed it. Price was totally reasonable and the gift shop had a nice selection. Also plenty of good parking.’

 

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Canadian Potato Museum (O’Leary, Canada)
‘Oh, the fates were cruel to me this day. I happened to pass through a town that shared my last name, and in that town I stumbled upon a giant fiberglass potato. In front of a potato museum. Which had gone out of business a week before. Now, really. That’s just not fair.’

 

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Oran Z’s Pan-African Black Facts & Wax Museum (Los Angeles)
‘Before he moved to an isolated spot in the Mojave desert 2012, Oran Z presided over an independent museum of his own making, Oran Z’s Pan-African Black Facts & Wax Museum in Los Angeles. It offered a dizzying kaleidoscope of black Americana, from wax figures to historical artifacts to racist, Jim Crow-era memorabilia. “We got to preserve the whole story,” he says. “You’ve got to deal with it and if you can’t see it, it don’t exist.” From 1999 to 2011, the popular local attraction presented an up close and idiosyncratic view of African-American history in a largely black neighborhood. But when a massive redevelopment project came to the area, Oran says, he was forced to close. He packed his collection — some 3 million objects, he says — into shipping containers and exiled himself to the desert.’

 

 

*

p.s. Hey. ** David, Well, I think it’s settled that Franko liked you better than me, ha ha. Which is perfectly A-okay with me, need I add. ** David Ehrenstein, Thank you again! Yes, ‘Early Plastic’ is a treat. I should restore the post I made about it back in the day. ** Dominik, Hi!!! Ah, so your neck is your … what, Achilles Heel, I guess they say. I think for me it’s my lower back. It likes to make trouble. I grew too fast when I was a kid, and my spine is has a little less in-between fastener stuff than normal ones, and the bottom portion decides it doesn’t like that once in a while. But it got me out of the draft/military when I was a teen, so I should be grateful, I guess. I’m glad your neck is chilling out. Elijah Wood’s head is sitting here on my desk, and I look over at it once a while and scratch my chin and think, ‘Hm, what to do with you.’ Love is eternal, so he’s good. Of course I too got caught up in that ‘draw me until (I) cant be no more’ thing. Those escorts can be such accidental geniuses at times. Love giving you a time machine and an annual VIP free pass to The Burnt Food Museum, G. ** _Black_Acrylic, Hi, B. ** T, Hi, T. Harry Nilsson isn’t really on the radar these days, but he’s one of those guys who could pop back in if some viral movie stuck his stuff on the soundtrack, which could easily happen. I like the idea of a marketing guy coming up with an official depressing day because I cant figure out how that could be monetised unless one had a financial stake in The Smiths’ recorded output or something. Cool that you re-picked up guitar. I played guitar in my teens and had a couple of bands, but I (wisely) recognised my mediocrity re: the instrument and sold mine and now I couldn’t make a basic chord if you paid me. ‘Powderfinger’ is a cool song, and, yeah, fun to play, I can only imagine. I think you might be right about the seasickness problem, and I get seasick floating on a raft on a lake, so oh well, although there is Dramamine. I’m totally down with your programming idea/plan. It makes me want to figure out how to do that with a Word doc. Very nice about the Japanese class. Lucky kids. Wow, about it being possibly easy for you to get French citizenship. Even more reason to beat myself up for never learning fluent French. My yesterday plans (Zoom meeting about the Home Haunt/game funding proposal and going around to galleries) got delayed until today, so it was kind of a nonstarter. Ha ha, I would be so tempted to push that red button and probably so sorry (for everyone within eyesight) if I did. I hope your day is even more exciting to experience than The Museum of Celebrity Leftovers. xo. ** Steve Erickson, A Sirk Day will be in the docket soon. You managed to make that Radu Jude film make me somewhat itchy to see it. Have the biggest day imaginable! ** Okay. I restored an old post containing an array of defunct museums so please scroll through it and weep. See you tomorrow.

11 Comments

  1. _Black_Acrylic

    That Museum of Celebrity Leftovers in Cornwall looks like being quite a lovable endeavour. Such a shame it never went the distance.

    The bad news here is that Dad is in hospital right now for some tests and a blood transfusion. He’s lost weight but seems to be bearing up well right now They have him sat on a chair in the corridor as there are no beds due to our government’s chronic underfunding of the NHS. We expect him to be sent back home in a taxi later today, and it’s something of a stressful experience.

    Last night I saw the original 1944 Film Noir version of Nightmare Alley and it’s really great, with lots to say about faith and religion in there. Gotta say I’m not looking forward to the new remake, which is apparently 40 minutes longer and rather more of a mess.

  2. Dominik

    Hi!!

    Yeah, you could say that – about my neck. But shit, your spine/lower back issue is pretty painful to even read about! I remember a few occasions when you mentioned that it was acting up. And I guess when it hits, there’s not much to do but… deal with it ‘til it decides to leave? Maybe popping the occasional painkiller… (But, yes, let’s at least appreciate its service on the military front!)

    Yeah, both the escorts/slaves and the commenters surprise me with literary/thought gems sometimes – often, even. Probably almost never intentionally, haha.

    Ah, love knows me way too well! Thank you, haha! Love asking you out on a date to the Canadian Potato Museum after trying and failing to get a table at the R.M.C.M. Ramones Museum, Od. (It’s such a pity that these places are all defunct now. Some of these ideas were excellent, haha.)

  3. Bob

    The Museum of Bad Art has been alive and well in Somerville for many years !

    http://museumofbadart.org/somerville-theatre

  4. cal

    Ooo great post today. Displaced and abandoned museums are incredible, they have such a potential for movies and books. Sad to see the Museum of Bad Art closed down always wanted to check that place out. As an avid collector of terrible thrift store paintings it’s upsetting to see these voices going unheard.

  5. David Ehrenstein

    The Museum of Jurassic Technology in L.A. is noteworthy

  6. Misanthrope

    Dennis, Great re-run. And DavidE’s day yesterday was great too. There’s a reason I call him The Maestro.

    You know what? I haven’t told David that! It might just jar him.

    On second thought, I think I have and he was just like, um, okay, can I have $20?

    Ah, yes. My blog serial turned novel (which was always the plan, btw) The Autobiography of Mark Dennison. Callum Leckie is in Manchester, England. He’s working furiously on it now and just this week sent me some things. He’s gotten into collage and it works well for this. I’m liking what he’s done so far. Or, actually, loving it. He’s got about four or five more collages to go. At that point, we’ll get it sorted re: putting it all together and getting it to the publisher we have in mind. So, yes, Mr. Mind Reader, hehe, it’s coming together. Thanks for asking, I really appreciate it.

    Oh, and yeah, I meant real decapitation videos. Granted, most of them are terrorists/Taliban/ISIS doing them, so they get boring after a while. The worst I’ve seen (and I haven’t watched one in years) was the Taliban forcing a 12-year-old boy to saw off a man’s head with a not-so-sharp knife. At the end, the kid is holding the head and the men are cheering, but the look on the kid’s face is like, I think I just destroyed my life, wtf, this isn’t as great as I thought it’d be. It’s quite sad.

  7. Bill

    I’ve only been to Morbid Anatomy and the Holography museum (decades ago). Sad to hear they’re gone. I’d totally visit quite a few of the others too.

    Like Steve, I’m pretty busy with worldscinema downloads! The COUM doc is surprisingly balanced and has lots of vintage photos and footage. Haven’t got to Memoria yet.

    Bill

  8. David

    I’ve been to Aruba with my sister… it was a very beautiful place unfortunately we didn’t see the museum as far as I remember…

    Would you ever do a Dennis Cooper Museum? or a show of your stuff… I think it would be brilliant….

    I got stressed today and bit at my arm a number of times… it left a few marks and some blood… not a massive big deal… everything sharp is hidden from me luckily… although I did find a pair tweezers from a cristmas cracker… and only succeeded in doing a few scratches…. I also said some very messed up stuff… luckily within the apartment so no one heard I don’t think… I used to cut myself a lot… I remember seeing Marilyn Manson doing that shit… and it made me feel better…

    I’m currently watching Curb your enthusiasm…. so you like that show??

    cheers for the post! xx

  9. T

    If you assembled all of these together on a single site, what a theme park it would make… I spent about half an hour today trying to relocate a half-remembered museum of antique medical and dental technology in the south of France that my family took me too when I was loads younger, and was completely deserted, but to no avail. The marketing exec single-handedly intervening to boost Smiths sales is a beautiful image, I fear it might have been to flog more prosaic things like self-care bubble baths and scented candles, or whatever’s meant to make you feel better about yourself. And though my French ability is pretty serviceable, I think the only reason they’re potentially giving me a passport is because I lucked out with a French grandmother and a tenuous blood link to the soil. Hope the funding meeting went smoothly – is the plan to release the home haunt project as a video game or similar? I can’t remember whether you said it was a VR thing? Hope your Thursday is like all of Paris outside your apartment being bulldozed to make way for a Mike Cline-designed life size foam replica. xT

  10. Steve Erickson

    I realized yesterday that combined with earlier downloads of movies which were sitting on my hard drive, I had dl’d about 30 GB of movies. I put some on an external drive, and I’m trying to get through all the worldscinema.org downloads before I do any more. When “information wants to be free,” compulsive consumerism is a very easy habit to fall into.

    I fear this sounds rather masturbatory, but tomorrow afternoon I am recording an appearance on a friend’s podcast. We’ll be discussing my music and other work, as well as the work we’ve done together. (He’s acted in several of my films.) I don’t know when it will go up, but it will likely be next week.

    A new Conspiracy Museum catering to the Q crowd must be around the corner! (Their target audience doesn’t believe COVID is real, so they could do well right now.)

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